


Coalescence

by Vespertine Enchanted (DollFinChick)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, Adventure & Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Idiots in Love, Love Triangle, Love Triangles, M/M, Magic, Multi, Not Canon Compliant, OC, Self-Insert, Slow Burn, Sort Of, Time Travel, muggle to magic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-20
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-04 16:00:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 39,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12774480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DollFinChick/pseuds/Vespertine%20Enchanted
Summary: Does the fanfiction realm need another original character insert? Probably not. But here's my take anyway.Alexandra Hughes didn't at first realize she'd been transported into the World of Harry Potter. Then again, there were plenty of clues.





	1. Vanishing

I panicked.   
  
Completely lost it.    
  
I’m telling you, I’ve had panic attacks before but this was the  _ King _ of all panic attacks. Mothers were steering their kids away from me it was that bad. I couldn’t breathe. I’m pretty sure I was hyperventilating. My eyes might have even rolled back in my head at some point. I collapsed where I was and started crying. Nobody stopped to ask what was wrong, or see if I was okay. 

They all just shot me weird looks. 

I could barely move. I was too afraid too, because of the illogical circumstance I found myself in. It took a while before I felt like I could stop panicking. Before I felt like I dared move. But you can only cry so long before it seems silly to keep crying. Eventually my heart rate calmed a bit and my breathing became less ragged.

Nothing had changed while I had briefly checked out of reality. I was still sitting on a city street. I was the weird one in this situation. My surroundings were perfectly normal, except they weren’t. People streamed by on the sidewalk while I sat huddled against the brick wall, wide-eyed and waiting for the other shoe to drop. The mundanity of city life moved on.

Logic dictated that everything was fine. The sun was shining. I was unhurt. However I was feeling a little paranoid about trusting logic, because it was not  _ logical _ . Sure, everything around me was utterly normal looking, except for the fact that  _ it couldn’t be, _ because last time I checked I had been getting out of my car in the parking lot and getting ready to carry my groceries into my apartment. 

Definitely  _ not _ standing on a sidewalk in a busy city.   


I was plenty lucid and wide awake. I was still clutching my plastic grocery bags even, and my backpack still lay across my shoulders. I stuffed the bags into my backpack. I didn’t know why but it seemed like a good idea to have my hands free.

  
I had either gone totally off my rocker or...or...I wasn’t quite sure what.    
  
Logic dictated that maybe I’d wandered downtown? Driven to the wrong spot? I finally paid a little more attention to my surroundings, but there wasn’t a parking lot in sight. Just a little park across the street, and a row of shops to either side of me. A stoplight at the corner.

I started as a car came careening down the wrong side of the street, but nobody else seemed to notice. The car was an old one, the shape something from my vaguely remembered childhood…

It wasn’t on the wrong side of the street, I realized, as another one zipped by and nobody else panicked like I was. In my defense, terrorists had been using cars to hit people lately...but in fact...I squinted at the driver of the next car to pass by. The steering wheel was on the opposite side of the car…

  
I took some deep breaths. Okay. No, I wasn’t in downtown Newark. But I could salvage this. I could make this be okay. 

“Hey!” I blurted, startling a passing guy in a business suit. He looked rather vintage. They all did, but it hadn’t quite sunk into my brain yet. I didn’t want to believe it.

“Can I borrow your cell phone?” I asked, trying not to seem crazy and like I hadn’t been bawling my eyes out just a few minutes ago. I don’t think it worked

He looked baffled, and edgy. Like I was making him nervous.

“What?” he asked.

“Your phone?” I asked again, feeling desperate.

“There’s a phone booth over on the corner,” He told me, waving his briefcase in the direction. Indeed, there was a bright red telephone booth there. I blinked at it stupidly. I had never been in the presence of a red phone booth before. I hadn’t seen a pay phone for years.

“Here,” He continued, digging in his pocket to remove a wallet, I tried to protest as he held out a bill and some change, but he waved me off, “You look like you need it more than me,” he said. I took the money with numb hands. I opened my mouth to say something else but he was already off the street again before I could bring myself to say another word.

I stared at the unfamiliar coins in my hand.

I glanced about me one more time, uncomprehendingly, between the phone booth and the  _ obviously _ not American currency. Britain. I was in Britain?! 

I’d only ever traveled to Europe once before, and never the U.K. I had no idea how I’d gotten here.

How was it possible? 

I already knew, based on what little evidence I had gathered, despite the illogic of it, that there was no way in hell that I was going to be able to call anyone I knew. Probably. 

Unless I had stumbled on a convention devoted to nostalgia, I was pretty sure I’d somehow gone back in time.

I noticed a newspaper machine near the telephone booth. Another relic I hadn’t seen in years. There used to be one in my neighborhood when I was a kid. I’d usually be sent with a few quarters to buy one. I liked to check the movie times and my dad had read the rest.

I was strangely drawn to it. So I got to my feet and approached. Another man beat me there and slotted his coins in to retrieve the paper. He tossed me an extra copy with a wink “No need to waste your money, eh? They can afford one lost paper for a pretty girl like you.” I stammered a thank-you, at which he brightened.

“American, huh? In town long?”

“Um, Probably not.” I mumbled. The man frowned, “I see how it is. Bloke gives a girl a compliment and she brushes him off…” he grumbled, walking away with a scoff. 

“Your love life is the  _ least _ of my problems right now dude.” I muttered at his retreating back. I tucked the paper under my arm and went to stand against the wall again.

May 3rd 1989. It was a Wednesday...but it was supposed to be Monday. I hadn’t even been born yet. My fingers smudged the ink as my hands tightened on the newsprint. 

“This has to be a joke.” I informed the air in front of me, lowering the paper. I glanced at the phone booth. Well, there was one number I could call.

The booth smelled like piss and I was wary of touching the phone itself, but I had to know. I deposited the coins, connected to the operator, then gave her the number I knew had not changed since the late 1960s. 

I held my breath as it rang, once, twice, a third time…

“Hello? Moden residence, this is Eleanor speaking.”

“Grandma!” I said, half in relief, half in wonderment.

“I’m sorry, you must have the wrong number.” She informed me politely. 

Whoops. She wasn’t exactly a grandmother yet. Wouldn’t be for another year and a half. A stranger to me this woman was, but her voice long missed, made tears come to my eyes, “W-wait!” I said hurriedly, pressing the phone against my ear harder, “You must have misheard, this is...Alexandra Hughes...could I speak with Amanda please? I’m a friend from college.” I lied, and it made me sick, lying to my grandmother.

My grandmother who had been dead for over a decade.

There was a pause. My heart was pounding loudly in my ears.

“There’s no Amanda here, dear.” The reply sent my stomach plummeting. I tried one last time, “But this is the Moden residence? Are you sure?” I felt nauseous.

“I’m certain. I don’t have a daughter.” Came the reply, politely confused, “Forgive me, but you sound upset. Are you alright?” She asked, kindness in her tone. That was my grandmother alright, I thought, tears in my eyes again. I didn’t want to hang up, but I couldn’t keep her on the line. She didn’t know me. Apparently, she’d never know me, because my mom didn’t exist.

“I’m fine, thank you. S-s-sorry. I-I must have had the wrong number after all.” I clutched the phone harder to my ear.

“Quite alright. You have a good day.”

“Goodbye,” I said. 

_ Wait, don’t go. _ I wanted to say.

She hung up. The dial tone rang in my ears.

I hung up the receiver. My grandma was alive, but she didn’t know me. My mother didn’t exist. 

So not back in time. A parallel universe?

The walls seem to press in on me suddenly. I fumbled for the door and stumbled into the air. 

What now? What did I do now? 

Cold fear filled me and I choked.

Away. I had to...get away.

I stumbled across the street. I made it to a trash can before I threw up. Barely.

I spat bile into the can. A young woman looked at me with disgust in her eyes as she passed. I spat again, but the taste of acid lingered in my mouth.

There was a bench a little ways away. I claimed in and laid down. The sun shone serenely above me. 

Facts:

I was in a  foreign country.

I had (almost) no money

The bacon in my backpack was probably going to spoil.

It was 1989.

My mother apparently didn’t exist. 

I couldn’t go to the authorities. I had no documents. I didn’t exist. Maybe if I was a kid I could get away with it, but not as an adult. I didn’t think my acting skills were good enough to claim amnesia. I didn’t want to be in trouble with the law. What was I supposed to do?

I needed money.

But...even in...the future...people were undocumented. They had jobs, houses, cars, and stuff. My job is...was...a stupid call center job, but I also was an artist on the side. I could draw.

A little hope made me feel better. I did have some skills. This was a city, so there were probably tourists. I could do caricatures. I had pens and pencils with me, though no sketch book, but I bet I could buy one with the money I got.

I sat up and opened my backpack, pulling my water bottle out. I drank some. I had some food. A box of cereal, a loaf of bread, peanut butter, a box of mint tea, milk, bacon, and eggs.

I immediately threw out the eggs, bacon, and milk. It was not like I could cook them and they were heavy.

Maybe I could find a hostel. The bill I’d been given said 5 pounds. I’m sure it was worth more than I was used to 5 bucks being, even without conversion, but I was also sure it was still not enough to buy me a place for the night. 

It was still day time. Sometime in the afternoon I judged. My grandmother had answered the phone, and the time difference was only a couple of hours to the east coast. I felt sad again, but I pushed it away. I had other things to do.

It was easy enough to walk until I found store that sold some art supplies. I had more than enough cash for a nice sketchpad and some markers. I then walked towards where I saw the traffic heading and people moving towards. 

I was in London. There was no mistaking those famous landmarks. I quickly found a park and set up. I sketched some random caricatures, displayed them on a bench, plastered on my nicest smile, and started asking people if they wanted their face drawn.

I had to lower my prices as the first few people told me they were outrageous, but I was used to charging more. Caricatures were easy, quick, and by the time the sun started to go down I had gone through half of the paper and had a reassuringly large wad of cash.

I’d done caricature work before, for fairs, conventions, things like that. I usually did pretty well at these places, and the money made me feel a lot better.

It did make me feel nervous to be carrying that much cash around. I would have to figure that out because I couldn’t carry it around everywhere and I probably couldn’t open a bank account either. Not without identification. I’d probably get the cops called on me with my accent and suspicious lack of identification. 

I also had to be careful because unless times had changed that much, selling art on the street could break a law somewhere.

I had food on me, and my hard earned money wasn’t something I wanted to spend unless I had to. I was able to ask my last client of the day to direct me towards a cheap hostel. 

The place wasn’t the nicest, but the rates were a lot less than I’d been expecting. I paid for a week in advance. The room I got had bunk beds and lockers in which to store your stuff. I had to pay extra for bedding and a towel, but I’d expected that. Somebody was already asleep in the top bunk on the right so I took the bottom bunk on the left.

The bathroom down the hall had generic flowery smelling soap in the dispensers but I welcomed the hot water as it coursed over my skin. Food wasn’t allowed in the room but I ate some of my bread and peanut butter anyway, washing it down with water refilled in my bottle from the tap. I hope it wouldn’t upset my stomach.

I listened to the noisiness of the city beneath the thin blanket. I needed new clothes. I needed a lot of things, but for now I was clean and had a full stomach. I should be grateful for that. I burrowed under the covers and the exhaustion of the day crept over me until I was fast asleep.

* * *

My days passed in much the same way for a few months. I would get up, eat, find a spot with tourists, then draw most of the day. I only stopped for lunch and at night. I switched it up from caricatures to drawing scenery and landmarks. The usual kind of junk you can buy in a scenic area.

I stockpiled my cash in my backpack and switched hostels frequently. I didn’t want anyone to question why I was staying in one place too long. I bought second hand clothes and washed them frequently. I couldn’t carry much so I only bought what could fit in my backpack. On rainy days I staked out cafes and peddled my art there. 

One cafe owner liked me enough that she offered me a job. Between the art and my job as a waitress, I was doing really well. I was tired, and I was still baffled as to why I was here, but I was making the most of it.

I wasn’t the kind of person to wallow in despair. I was hard working. I didn’t mind boring jobs as long as they paid. I took as many hours at the cafe as I could and sold my art on the side. I had even picked up a few clients who wanted paintings. I had a pretty steady income. 

I had just over a thousand pounds in two months, and so I started looking for an apartment. My boss helped me find one, provided references, and soon I had my own place. It even came with a stove and a fridge. No other furniture though. I slept on the floor for awhile until I could afford a bed. 

* * *

It was around this time that logic started losing me as a lifetime fan again.

I had seen...well some odd things.

Nothing as odd as appearing in the middle of 1989 London from 2017 Newark, NJ, but still…

Odd.

The first odd incident happened about two months after I had started living in London and I was still bouncing around hostels. I had been drawing a picture of the Thames when I saw a strangely dressed man just vanish.

I actually flinched hard enough to drop my pencil. He had been wearing the oddest combination of a tutu, jeans, and a fisherman’s rain coat. With a fedora. I had assumed he was a performer of some sort. I had even included him in my sketch, thinking it amusing.

I wasn’t so amused now. He hadn’t vanished in plain sight exactly, just walked behind a tree and then not walked from behind it. But the tree wasn’t that thick, He should still be visible. Only he wasn’t.

Having recently been a disappearing reappearing person myself, it was concerning.

I watched for over an hour, but the strange fellow never came back.

About a month later, I saw three owls, in broad daylight, swooping through the street as I opened the blinds in the cafe in preparation for opening. An owl in London would have been strange enough, but three of them! Very strange. I could have sworn they were holding something, but they flew too fast for me to be sure.

Linda, my boss, had seen them too.

“Reminds me, oh a few years ago, we had owls flying all over the place. Nobody could figure it out, but it was such a sight! They went away after a few days, but I’ll never forget.” She said, tucking a gray strand of hair behind an ear, “Haven’t seen one in daylight around here since.”

I peered out the window, but the owls were gone again.

Something about the conversation pricked at my mind. I felt like I was missing something important. 

After that I kept noticing more and more odd things. A double decker bus went careening wildly down the street, nearly hitting people several times, swerving into oncoming traffic, but nobody else seemed to notice. I had flung myself against the side of a building, but I only earned myself a bunch of strange looks from passerby. 

I seemed to see strange people, by which I mean strangely dressed people, vanishing all the time. I’d see someone walk down an alley and vanish. Or duck into a phone booth and then vanish. Once I was even close enough to hear a strange popping noise. 

And I couldn’t tell anyone. They’d all think I was crazy, and I was only mostly sure I wasn’t.

Another time, I was walking down the street past a condemned department store, Purge and Dowse (which had amused me because of the strange name so I liked passing it on my way back to my apartment) when I saw someone looking distinctly ill step right through a window and vanish.

I stopped in my tracks and stared. Either I was going nuts, or I was sensitive to people vanishing. I knew it wasn’t entirely impossible (after all, I had done it) but I couldn’t understand why nobody else seemed to notice. 

I avoided going past that place anymore.

A week later I was frightened and angry. I’d seen a nice looking elderly lady vanish earlier. I was feeling anxious and cornered. I had no idea what was going on, or who to turn to. I paced my bedroom floor. I felt an odd pressure, almost a restlessness building under my skin, but I had no idea how to relieve it.

I was so tired, but I couldn’t relax enough to sleep. For all that I’d wondered if I was going crazy, I had never felt like I was going insane before. Now I did.

A loud bang from a car backfiring outside made my heart nearly jump out of my chest. Simultaneously everything on my bedside stand flew off of it and hit the wall. My half full water glass literally flew in a straight line and shattered against the wall, followed by a book and a bottle of ibuprofen. 

Silence. I was once again frozen and panicking. Vanishing people were one thing but levitating glasses were quite another! 

I felt cold and hot all over. I couldn’t breathe. 

“What the fuck?!” I shouted, clutching my chest. I nervously edged closer, but all I could see were the broken fragments of glass and spilled water. I fished my book out and shook the water off of it. 

I stared at the broken glass, but it remained broken glass. I accidentally stepped on a piece and swore when I went to get the broom and dustpan.

Nothing else flew across the room that night, or any other night. 

I slept fine that night, strangely enough. I was so tired. So very tired. I went to work the next day in a much better mood.

A week after that, I was practically clawing the walls with anxiety again, but this time, it was my kitchen towel that spontaneously combusted. I quickly doused it with water and I stared at the charred remains.

I buried them as deep in the dumpster in the alley as I could.

Strangely, my nameless anxiety was gone. You’d think it would be the opposite, with these strange occurrences, but for all that I’d been restless and like a sleepless zombie for several days, now I slept deeper than I could ever remember doing before.

I lasted two more weeks before I had another incident, but this time, it wasn’t in my apartment. 

I was in the cafe, serving people as best as I could. I was exhausted, having been unable to sleep at all the previous night. I was feeling very stressed out because we were busier than usual and the other waitress had not shown for her shift. My feet were killing me, and the customers were being snottier than usual.

I was aggravated, and not watching where I was going, and I ended up dropping a whole pot of tea all across the floor on my way back out to the dining room. I was about to burst into tears from frustration when all of a sudden...the teapot was whole again and sitting on the counter. There was even tea in it. The mess was gone.

“You okay? Thought I heard a crash.” Linda said, popping her head around the corner. 

“Fine. I’m fine.” I replied, picking up the teapot and placing it back on the tray. I waited until she turned away before scrutinizing the pot. I was still tired, but I didn’t feel half as stressed suddenly. I was sensing a pattern.   
  


“Somebody is fucking with me.” I muttered, and turned away. Strange self-repairing teapot or no, I had a job to do. I’d think about this later.

* * *

“That’s the third incident in a muggle area this month.” Kinsey said frustratedly, shaking the report in Adames face.

Adames sighed, and took the parchment. “Probably just a muggleborn kid. Just an unusually powerful one.” She said, trying to placate her partner.

“Too strong. Whoever it is mucking about with their magic shouldn’t be doing it so close to muggles, and it’s too close to wizarding dwellings. Which is the only reason we’re picking it up at all!” Kinsey huffed.

Adames inwardly groaned. There hadn’t been much going on in the Auror department recently, and Kinsey was probably just going a little stir-crazy. He was like a kneazle with a puffskein. He wasn’t going to let this go. 

Well it wouldn’t hurt to check it out, and it would probably get him off her back for a bit. She’d much rather be chasing down miscreant wandless magic outbursts than dark wizards.

“Alright then. We’ll check it out if it happens again.” She told him, wearily handing back the report.


	2. Discovering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I didn't expect there to be such interest in this haha Thanks guys! Hope you enjoy the chapter :)

**** After my shift was over I hurried back to my apartment as quick as I could. I was once again exhausted but I pushed away my tiredness and forced myself to drink a cup of coffee. Man I missed my Keurig.

Then I sat down and contemplated what I knew. For sure, I’d been seeing some odd things lately. And I couldn’t ignore that latest weird circumstances seemed to react to my moods. Or perhaps caused them since I felt much better after they had happened.

So the question was, could I make something weird happen on purpose?

I placed my mug on the counter thoughtfully. Logic (though I was quickly being disabused that any such thing actually existed) dictated that what I’d done accidentally could also be done on purpose. Maybe.

Well it didn’t hurt to try, did it?

Feeling rather foolish, I fetched a piece of paper and pushed what meager furniture I had to the corners of the main area in my apartment. In the center of this space I placed the paper on the floor.

I wasn’t sure quite where to begin. I held out my hand in front of my body, arm extended and palm down. I closed my eyes.

The levitation, combustion, and repair had all happened when I was feeling particularly stressed. I tried to recall how that felt. The nameless energy writhing beneath my skin, the sleeplessness, the frustration.

When I felt I had it, I opened my eyes.

Nothing had changed. The white rectangle on the floor seemed to mock me for my stupidity.

I did feel really silly. But I wasn’t a quitter. I had to give it my best try.

“Abracadabra.” I said, in as solemn a voice as I could manage

The paper didn’t seem impressed.

“Open sesame?” I tried.

“Okay, okay, tough customer.” I muttered.

I wiggled my fingers, “Um what other magic phrases do I know? Stenr reisa?”

Okay stupid, that was for stones.

“Reisa?” I asked hopefully. The paper remained unmoved.

I waved my hand again,”Brisingr!” I said forcefully.

Still nothing. Ah well, the Ancient language was a long shot. Not sure why it even occurred to me in the first place. There weren’t exactly any dragons around.

Still, as long as I was on literary conlangs…

“Renia!”

“Ghâsh!”

Okayyyy. Maybe not. I felt more and more like the nerd I was by the second. Another thought occurred to me. 

“Wingardium Leviosa!” I said.

Immediately I felt...something. Like my fingers were placed too near an open flame. Maybe a slight tingling.

I brought my hand towards my face but inspection yielded nothing. The paper hasn’t moved so much as an inch.

But maybe I was doing it wrong? I could hear Emma’s voice from the movie in my head “ _ Swish _ and  _ flick _ .” I didn’t exactly have a wand, but swishing my hand and flicking it seemed simple enough.

I tried again “Wingardium Leviosa!”.

The paper moved.

Barely. It didn’t exactly fly through the air or float upwards. It kinda just...fluttered...half a centimeter. Less even. It didn’t even leave the floor, it just scooted a bit.

It was probably caused by a draft somewhere. God knows my apartment wasn’t insulated all that well. I sighed and lowered my hand. It didn’t feel tingly or hot anymore. It was probably all in my head. Too much work, not enough down time.

The only thing was, I knew for certain that the other things hadn’t all been in my head. I had definite proof for at least the glass and the towel. 

I knew I wasn’t crazy. At least, not any crazier than anyone else. But I was sure acting like a madwoman, trying to move stuff with my mind.

I moved everything back. The paper got tucked away, and I tried to put it out of my head. 

* * *

TAP TAP TAP

I woke the next morning to a sharp rapping noise. It still being early, and not knowing anyone who would have cause to be knocking on my door, I buried under the covers and tried to ignore it. 

I’d been having a lovely dream about ice cream and cotton candy...and dragons. Vampires too. There had been a war where both sides had tried to steal the other’s secret recipes. I couldn’t quite recall why the dragons were involved actually

In my defense it had all made perfect sense in my dream. 

TAP TAP TAP

I groaned into my pillow. “G’way.” I muttered. I was in the middle of fighting the Vampire Queen for supreme chef rights to cookie dough ice cream. The dragons were on my side.

TAP TAP TAP TAP

It was no use. I was awake now. I pushed away the rapidly fading remnants of my dream and sat up with a huff. 

“Hold on!” I shouted, dragging my body out of bed. I rubbed my eyes and tried to smooth my hair down. 

I went to my front door. I peeked through the spy hole but there wasn’t anyone in the hall. Confused, I opened the door. But nobody was there. I looked up and down the hall but there wasn’t a sign of anyone.

Man I was really craving ice cream now.

TAP TAP TAP TAP TAP

The noise insisted loudly behind me. I startled and spun in place. It was coming from inside my apartment

From my window?

I cautiously approached and stared stupidly at the sight outside

There was a tub of ice cream bumping repeatedly against the glass. I rushed forward and cranked the window open as fast as I could. I made a grab for it, worried somebody might have seen a disembodied tub of ice cream levitating outside.

The tub ignored me and flew through the air to land on my counter. I glared at it, hoping it would stay put. It didn’t budge, so I poked my head out the window. I didn’t see anything or anyone about.

I closed the window, then turned around. 

The ice cream mocked me from the counter. Sitting there quiescently and innocently. I approached warily, snagging a spatula from the mug on the counter as I walked towards it

I poked the container with my improvised weapon and immediately jumped back.

But nothing happened. No explosions. No combustion.

Just a tub of vanilla ice cream sitting on my counter. 

I dropped the spatula with a clatter and carefully poked the container with my hand. It was cold.

_ No duh, Alexandra. It’s fucking ice cream. _

Removal of the lid only revealed delicious creamy dairy goodness. I wasn’t quite brave enough to try a taste (though it smelled fantastic and looked like a brand I’d seen at the grocery store).

Instead I transferred it to my freezer and automatically went to make some tea.

Okay so I dream about ice cream and suddenly ice cream magically appears before me.

Strange, but not the strangest thing I’d seen so far. I sipped at my mug and wondered why vanilla. I mean, I’d been dreaming about cookie dough specifically. So why vanilla? Sure I liked vanilla but if something was going to make my wishes come true why not make my exact wish come true?

_ Not the biggest issue here girl _ . I thought.

* * *

“I told you!” Kinsey said, slapping another report down in front of Adames.

The female Auror blinked blearily at him. She hadn’t even finished her first cup of coffee damnit. “Alright,” she sighed, squinting at the parchment memo. 

“Give me a tic and we’ll go check it out.” 

She raised her mug at him and he frowned, “We really shouldn’t delay,” he sniffed imperiously.

“Fuck it all Kinsey, just let me finish my coffee or I’ll fucking hex your bollocks purple.” She growled in return, a scowl on her face. “I just sat down you tosser. The kid isn’t going anywhere. It can wait a damned minute!” 

He spluttered in offense but left her desk quick enough. Adames didn’t make idle threats and she certainly could move quick enough to get the drop on him and he knew it.

Locke shot her a commiserating look two desks over as Kinsey stormed by his desk. 

She sipped her coffee extra slowly and checked the parchment. First thing in the morning and they already had legwork. Figures.

They arrived at the area of the latest alert of accidental magic and Kinsey cast a set of diagnostic spells. Adames secured the area from muggle interference with a Notice-Me-Not charm.

“Well, that’s not a kid.” Adames said, peering at the flashing lights. “That looks like some idiot just hasn’t been practicing their magic. Or they have poor control.”

“Either way,” Kinsey said, putting his wand away, “There isn’t supposed to be a wizard in the area. In a muggle apartment building no less.” 

Adames sighed, “Well we’ve got enough evidence to charge them. Let’s go find them.”

They tracked the outbursts to an apartment on the third floor. There was more than enough magical residue to be concerning. 

Magic just didn’t mix well with muggles. It was a safety concern for both the wizard and the muggles. That’s why the ministry enforced registration of magical dwellings and didn’t like when wizards were too close to their muggle neighbors. It threatened the statute. It only took one person noticing something magical for things to go very wrong.

* * *

I was cleaning my apartment when I heard another series of knocks. I warily eyed the window but this time they definitely came from my front door. I didn’t bother checking the peephole and opened the door.

On the other side stood two people. A dark skinned woman with a riot of curly brown hair looking very put upon and a man with a vaguely determined look about him.

“Um, can I help you?” I asked.

“Ah, yes you can,” said the woman, “However, since this is a muggle area, mind if we come in?” She peered around my door.

Muggle? What the fuck?

“I don’t want to be rude, but who are you?” I asked, baffled. The woman immediately pulled a badge out of her pocket and held it up for my inspection, “I’m Auror Adames, and my partner is Auror Kinsey.

_ Auror Adames DMLE  _

It had a wand on it and everything. My feeling of incredulity rose. I looked between the badge and her face, which was set seriously.

“But the books haven’t been published yet.” I blurted out, then immediately winced.

That got me a raised eyebrow. I blushed furiously, “I mean, I’m still working...On the books. Obviously.” I made up. 

They had to be messing with me, surely? But it didn’t make sense! Harry Potter hadn’t been written yet. And surely magic didn’t...well...my head spun.

Because wasn’t this the perfect answer to all the weirdness I’d been witness to recently? OH MY GOD THE OWLS. 

Heedless to my slight existential breakdown, the aurors on my doorstep continued to frown at me.

“What does that even mean? Look,” said the man a bit pompously, “We’ve already got evidence you’ve been having accidental bursts and you haven’t registered with the Ministry…”

“But I don’t...I mean I’m not…” I tried to protest. Did they think I was a witch? WAS I a witch? What?

Adames sighed, “Do you have identification from MACUSA? We thought there was a muggleborn child around until we got here, and it’s a misdemeanor to practice wandless magic in a muggle area you know…”

“Are you shitting me? You can’t be serious.” I said, staring at them. 

Adames pursed her lips at me and stepped forward. I automatically stepped out of her way and she swept past me into my apartment, Kinsey following.

“Quite serious.” She said disapprovingly.

“Sorry?” I tried.

Kinsey scowled at me, and suddenly a stick was in his hand. I flinched, but all he did was wave it and mumble something. Immediately the sounds of traffic outside faded away to nothing. I stared at his wand, stupefied.

“Identification?” Adames asked again.

“I wasn’t aware I needed any?” She looked at me as if I had just said the stupidest thing she’d heard that morning. 

“I just want to live a quiet life!” I protested. More in general than in particular addressing her question. I hadn’t asked for this!

Kinsey scoffed but Adames held out a hand, “Well you’ll have to come in and register with our ministry then if you wish to continue residence here. You’ll also have to pay the fines. Can you apparate?

“I don’t have a wand.” I said. “I’m not a-“

But Kinsey cut me off, “We’ll have to side along you then. You’ll need to get a new one. You’re probably having accidental bursts because you haven’t replaced it yet.” He informed me.

“But I never-“ this time Adames cut me off.

“It’s not common, but it can happen. Magic needs to be used, you see. Did it break when you port keyed over? That happened to me once. International travel is awful.”

“You guys make an awful lot of assumptions.” I muttered. No wonder Voldemort came into power again and so easily took over the Ministry. 

Will come into power. Holy fuck.

But I didn’t get much more than another moment to freak out before Kinsey was holding out an arm. I just stared.

“Well go on. We haven’t got all day.” Adames said impatiently.

“Surrreeee.” I said. Well if they were lying, as common sense told me they were, then nothing would happen from touching the guy’s arm.

As it happened, I should have known better than to trust logic anymore.

It felt like being squeezed through a tube. Like one of those toys filled with glitter and multicolored wax and oil. The world rushed by in a dizzying series of impressions, but only for a few moments. Then I was stumbling on my feet again and desperately trying not to throw up.

It didn’t help that my head was still spinning from magic. Because seriously. MAGIC? And not just any magic, but like full on JK Rowling magic.

Adames gripped my elbow to steady me as I gulped in breaths of air and tried not to panic. Kinsey was looking at me like I was slime under his shoe.

“Go on then. I’ve got this.” Adames said, waving peremptorily at him. He huffed but left across a lobby packed with people in robes. I saw a flash of green flame from the fireplaces lining the walls. 

A flock of paper airplanes swerved in front of us and then entered an elevator at the far end of the lobby. Adames steered me passed everything and I tried not to stare too much.

Yeah, I was fucked. 


	3. Freaking

 

So apparently being charged with a misdemeanor by the Ministry of Magic involves plenty of paperwork. 

This at least, was not all that different from any other stupid government bureaucratic nonsense that I have dealt with in the past. Fill out a bunch of forms. Sign at the X. The mundanity of a government office transcended worlds apparently. 

The only differences were that the coffee made itself and occasionally a paper airplane or animal would come in and land in an inbox on someone’s desk. Also, no computers, but there weren’t many of those about at this time in history anyway. I’d gotten used to it.

Still, the office Adames led me to was better than being in the lobby with so many weird people streaming in and out. I’d hardly known where to look.

I looked down at my hands. The forms were parchment and I was signing with a honest to god quill. It felt strange, but I’d dabbled in Calligraphy in one of my art classes in the past so I managed well enough. Still got ink on my fingers, but I didn’t care at this point.

I thought it was funny how they didn’t seem to care that I didn’t have any documents. I just muttered something about losing them in London (not exactly untrue) and Adames just shrugged and set me up with another load of paperwork to get some identification. Apparently wizards had a much looser set of rules for this.

My apartment, I found out, had to be muggle-proofed if I was to stay there. Which was apparently costly unless I was capable of doing it myself and then having someone inspect it. Adames told me it was probably best to move to a Wizarding area and she recommended a real estate agent. 

Since I had no Gringotts account, I was going to have to open one to pay the fees for my magic usage around muggles and having an unsecure home. 

Adames seemed to be under the impression I had fled the US in a hurry for some reason and lost most of my stuff in the process. She didn’t seem to think it odd that I didn’t know where anything in Wizarding London was. She clucked a few times about how hard it must have been without a wand.

I didn’t correct her.

It occurred to me that if I told the truth, they wouldn’t believe me anyway. For people who were capable of defying logic and physics, the wizards had still had a hard time grasping that some things were not impossible in the book series. I didn’t want to test if that also applied to real life.

I kinda floated through the whole process with a sense of detachment anyway. Who could blame me? It’s not everyday you find yourself transported into fictional world. 

Adames was brusque and no-nonsense and pushed me to move as speedily as possible. It didn’t exactly leave me with much time for lollygagging. I didn’t get to process what I was seeing. I didn’t even have a chance to second-guess whether or not I’d had a nervous breakdown and had totally lost it or not. I was leaning towards not, but I hadn’t been given a moment to make up my mind between filing paperwork and trying not to stare as a witch in a pointed hat waltzed by with a scowl and a huge toad that was swearing up a storm.

“Ugh. Swear Toads. Some dim bloke thought it was a bit of a laugh. Now the damn things are breeding at ridiculously fast rates and scaring the muggles.” Adames explained as I stared. 

The toad croaked, “Fucking bloody two bit whore!” Before the woman carrying it hastily cast a silencing charm. I watched as the toad made a bid for freedom and startled another wizard sitting at a desk by hopping across the flat surface and upsetting an inkwell.

The wizard’s swearing put the toad’s to shame.

“Here, you still need to sign…” Adames drew my attention away from the minor fiasco and back to the parchment in front of me.

Another set of signatures and initials and the next thing I knew Adames was escorting me out with the admonishment to fix everything or there would be an owl from the ministry. Kinsey glared at me from a desk as I left. 

“I don’t suppose you can tell me how to get to Diagon Alley from here?” I asked, breaking out of my bemusement. Adames shrugged and replied, “It’s my lunch break so I can take you there. You really ought to get your apparition license as soon as you can.” I just nodded.

* * *

 

Apparating for the second time was no more pleasant than the first, but this time Adames left me on my own with a wish to have a good day to stare down the insanity that was Diagon Alley. 

The Alley was nothing so much as a very closely packed street lined with shops that looked as if they were about to cave in towards the center any moment. All were what I thought of as old fashioned. All wood, brick, and pointy roofs. 

Plenty of people in robes whisked by, and I could see the white marble of what had to be Gringotts in the distance.

I’m not sure how long I stood there, clutching the packet I’d been given and watching families and people walk by. I got a few side glances, but that was probably because I was dressed in regular clothes and obviously dumbstruck. Eventually I shook myself out of it and headed towards the bank

I don’t think it really hit me that this was all very real until I was walking through the doors and a goblin sneered at me with pointed teeth. I was half tempted to poke him, but that would be unbearably rude. So instead I shuffled inside under his narrowed unfriendly gaze and found a line to wait in for one of the tellers.

I tried not to hyperventilate as I waited. This was real. Too real. I’d already seen weird stuff happening, but somehow this still freaked me out. Like I had been half hoping to be crazy. But I was really here. And those goblins did not look fake at all. 

Eventually it was my turn in line and I walked up to the stand with trepidation. I idly wondered if the height that towered over most humans was done on purpose. I had to stifle an untimely giggle as my mind offered a comment about compensating for something.

The look the new goblin gave me when I shuffled up made me feel like an insect, but I mustered my courage. “I’d like to open an account please,” I said, as politely as I could to a being I hadn’t thought existed at breakfast time today.

“Name?” he asked.

“Alexandra Hughes.” I replied.

“Wait over there,” he said, waving a hand dismissively at a row of unoccupied chairs. “You’ll be called.”

“Thank you.” I said. He gave me a funny look at that, but waved me off again.

I went and sat down, and tried not to stare at everything. 

Very soon afterwards another goblin whisked by and gestured for me to follow him. I was led through a hallway and passed a series of doors to an office where another goblin waited for me behind a desk.

“My name is Fireclaw. I hear you’d like to open an account with us, Miss Hughes, was it?” He said. He was quite a bit older than the other goblins I’d seen so far. He had white hair and glasses. His teeth didn’t look quite as sharp as the others I’d seen so far.

“Um yes. I’m new here and all I have is um, muggle money, but I got into a spot of trouble and need to pay some fines.” I handed over the paperwork Adames had told me to present to the Goblins and also pulled out my wallet. I usually had quite a bit of cash on me since I couldn’t open an account anywhere else. 

“No gold?” Fireclaw asked, eyeing the stack of paper. His lip curled as he read the paper which had the appropriate fines listed. They could take them right out of my account. Once I had one, that is.“Is that a problem?” I asked anxiously. I’d just assumed, because muggleborns had to get money some way. Surely they converted cash? The Wizarding economy couldn’t be completely isolated from the rest of the world, could it?

“It’s fine. Although we do require a certain amount deposited to open an account. Let me just see…” He trailed off, counted my cash, and then pulled out a piece of parchment to consult. 

What followed was the typical procedure in opening an account. Minus some of the paperwork I was used to. I had just enough cash on me to convert into galleons to make the minimum deposit and pay my fees. I had about twenty galleons converted and given to me. They were very heavy in my pockets. I was presented with a key and asked for a drop of blood to confirm my identity if I should ever lose it. I offered my hand and the goblin jabbed it with a pin. I winced as he collected it in a vial. Then he offered me a dab of some potion that healed the tiny cut up straight away and stopped the slight throbbing.

“Anything else I can do for you today?” He asked, a very standard question when doing banking. I paused, a thought had occurred to me.

“Do you allow investments in the muggle market?” I asked.

The goblin raised an eyebrow, “Of course,” he scoffed, “Wizards are so short-sighted about such things, but there’s plenty of gold to be made in muggle technology,” he sniffed imperiously.

I smiled. “Good to know,” I replied, “I’ll be back.”

* * *

I left Gringotts with a smirk. I had been wondering what to do with my cash for ages since it was literally piling up under my mattress. Yes, I’d been cliche enough to hide it there.

The goblins really had wizards by the balls when it came to finance. Their interest rates were abysmal and the hidden fees in the accounts were clever. Everything about the system was designed to squeeze as much money as possible from the consumer. To be fair, that’s just how any banking system worked.

But I had some future knowledge, if I could get up enough cash, that would pay off ridiculously handsomely in the future. Apple was already an established company, but Google, Facebook, Amazon...I could make a killing if I got in on those at the right time. Oh and bitcoin! The possibilities were endless.

I’d never been rich, nor had my family been all that well off. I’d use whatever knowledge I had and exploit it as best I could for personal gain just so I could be more comfortable later in life.

Assuming things weren’t too different here.

I had somehow accepted time travel easy enough, seeing as how I’d been living in the eighties for some months now. But I had always wondered why my mother didn’t seem to exist here. My grandmother did, weirdly enough, but not my mother. 

I would be lying if I said it hadn’t crossed my mind that I was in a parallel universe rather than just in the past. Did me being here, in Diagon Alley, in the wizarding world of Harry Potter change all that much? How was this real?

I fingered the gold in my pocket as I walked aimlessly up the street. I don’t know how it was possible, but I’d be an idiot not to accept the evidence before my eyes. I pinched my arm for good measure. It definitely hurt.

So if I was to believe Adames, I was a witch. Considering the weird things that had happened that I was pretty sure I was responsible for, this wasn’t that much more of a stretch. However it still felt unreal. And if I was a witch, what next? How was I supposed to learn magic? Was I even capable of it? Had I been a witch before I got here or had coming here changed me?

Holy fuck. Everything was about to go to shit in the next few years. What was I going to do about that? Who was I supposed to go to for help?

Obviously the Ministry was on my ass and I was going to have to move into the Wizarding world. How long could I keep up the pretense that I was just another witch? I didn’t know shit.

The conversion rate favored the galleon over the pound, and now that I had a bank account here it made little sense to continue working for pounds. Who would hire me? What wizarding job was I qualified for?

Damn. I needed to do some research. 

After all that, I knew what I had to do next. I hunted up and down the street with single-minded purpose until I found it. Ollivanders. 

I stood in front of the dusty shop and wondered.

Was I really a witch?

I took a deep breath and entered.

The shop was almost like a shoe store. With rows and rows of boxes lined up on the shelves. There was indeed a spindly chair out front and a counter. Everything was liberally coated in dust. I wondered irreverently with all the magic about why on earth was everything so dusty?

I didn’t have a chance to ring the bell on the counter before Ollivander emerged like vampire from the shadows. He was so pale and washed out looking, with a crazy cloud of white hair and silver eyes that glinted more sharply than a man that old had any right to look.

“Let’s see. I’ve never seen you in here before, Miss…?” He asked in a smooth voice.

“Hughes. Alexandra Hughes.”

“Ah American,” he blinked at me with those eerie eyes.

“Yeah, I need a new wand because my old one got broken.” I ventured as bravely as I could.

“I see. Hold out your wand hand.” He said, directing a tape measure towards me with his own wand. I held as still as possible as it began to take measurements.

“Right,” I said as Ollivander circled me, and stuck out my hand.

“Hm. What was it made out of? American wand-makers use some rather unusual materials. ”

Inwardly I panicked a bit.

“Um, I d-don’t know. It was a...a hand me down.” I lied.

Let me tell you, I don’t think he believed me for one second. One white eyebrow raised significantly but he didn’t question me further. The tape measure rolled up in a ball and deposited itself on the counter as he turned and started rummaging on the shelves.

“Walnut and Unicorn hair. Twelve inches and firm. Give it a try.” He handed me the first wand, but snatched it away again not a moment later.

“Mm. I think not,” he muttered, pulling down a few more boxes.

He placed another in my hand. “Chestnut and phoenix feather. Thirteen inches, swishy.”

I waved it and immediately the thing burst into flames. I dropped it with a yelp. My fingers were fine, but I hoped the wand was. I didn’t think I could afford two if one broke!

“Not to worry. Not to worry. That just narrows it down.” Ollivander said, scooping it up cheerfully. Why spontaneous combustion should make him happy I have no clue.

I went through about twelve more wands and I was beginning to wonder if I really could do magic when Ollivander presented me with a long, warm, reddish wand with spirals at the handle. 

“Ah yes let me see...Cherry with Dragon heartstring, flexible. Thirteen inches.”

Immediately upon touching it my heart lifted and I felt that same warmth from before rushing through my limbs. A shower of blue and gold sparkles poured from the tip as I waved it and a scent like floral perfume filled the air.

I stared at it stunned while Ollivander beamed at me. 

“Ah yes. I did think...it’s a rare wood to see, especially paired with that core, but it should serve you well in whatever endeavor you try. Young ladies always want a cherry wand you know, for its’ delicate pink tones, I imagine.” He cheerfully told me. “But it takes someone with exceptional strength of mind to control.”

I stared at it in wonder a bit longer.

“That will be fifteen galleons,” Ollivander gently said, and I immediately dug out the coins from my pocket. Pretty much all I had. 

I left Ollivander’s shop in a bit of a daze. So okay. I was definitely a witch. I had a wand, though I had no clue how to use it. Sure I knew a few of the spells, but I wasn’t stupid enough to try them with no prior knowledge.

I felt a little overwhelmed and immediately headed for the opposite end of the alley where I knew the Leaky Cauldron would be. I was lucky enough that others were already passing through the brick wall and I simply followed after and left the dark pub as quick as possible.

To my surprise, I wasn’t all that far from my apartment. I could have gotten there sooner on the bus but I decided to walk. I had a lot to think about.

My wand lay heavily in my pocket. I traced it with my fingers as I walked. The vague background anxiety that had been plaguing me on and off since I got here had lifted as soon as I had touched the wood. It hummed almost happily beneath my finger tips.

I felt so alive with energy. It was a weird feeling. Like someone had turned on an extra sense besides the usual hearing, smelling, touch, etc. 

I still had so much to do. So many decisions to make. And that was just personally. It was October 1989. I had two years before Harry Potter turned 11. That was a strange thought indeed.

I just...What was I supposed to do? Should I go to Dumbledore? If I did, should I tell him what I knew? What if I messed up things though? Would he even believe me? What proof did I have?

Well, I knew the locations of some very dark magical objects. I shuddered. It was horrifying just reading about it in fantasy.

It would turn out alright without my interference, I knew that. I wasn’t egotistical enough to think I was all that important in the scheme of things.

I was surprised to notice I was already at my apartment. I sighed and entered the building.

I didn’t have to decide anything right away, now did I?

I trudged upstairs and entered my apartment. Everything had changed, so it seemed almost surreal for my home to look exactly as I had left it.

I leaned against the door for a few minutes, just trying to process some more. Eventually I crossed the room and opened my refrigerator. I think finding out that I’m a witch called for a beer.

I drank the first one quickly. I choked a bit on the foam.

The second one went down more smoothly. I cracked a third, but I only sipped at this one.

I’d slunk down to lean against my kitchen cupboards while sitting splayed on the floor. I lifted the bottle to my lips lazily, chasing a spare drop of liquid down the glass with my tongue. 

The alcohol had hit my empty stomach and gone straight to my head. I was a bit dizzy, but I felt disconnected from my shock. Which is what I had wanted.

I closed my eyes and listened to my upstairs neighbor scrape chairs along the floor. A sound like a marble dropping made my head hurt and I winced. They were always dropping stuff.

I felt a bit nauseous now actually. I found a leftover takeout container and sat back down on the floor eating cold noodles with my bare hands. The third beer was gone, but I didn’t feel like getting another one.

It got dark before I moved again, and by that point I was sober and exhausted. I got to my feet and stumbled through my dark apartment. I crashed into bed and just lay there. 

Now that my brain was back online I couldn’t sleep.

I had too many things to think about. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Swear toads, you may or may not recognize, were lifted from another fandom entirely. Kudos if you know the reference.
> 
> Wand lore was researched from Pottermore. There's some fascinating notes on wand-making and what different woods/cores/lengths/flexibility mean there. 
> 
> Apparently there ARE some American wand-makers. Can't remember which site I got that from though.


	4. Planning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I got so much great feedback and encouragement. I'm so glad you're all enjoying my story! Definitely inspired me.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Definitely not. I just write this for fun.

I was usually quite good under pressure, but there are only so many shocks a girl can take and keep trucking on.

Sure, I had accepted that I was the hapless victim of some strange time-travel or dimensional displacement accident. I was just happy not to have turned into some kind of primordial goop. I wasn't very good at math but even I knew the chances of me living through whatever had happened were slim to none. I had to have either outrageously amazing luck or terribly horrific luck. Depending on your point of view. I was still alive. I had all my limbs intact and I wasn't dead or badly injured by my crazy trip through time/space.

I shuddered. Best not to think about it. I hadn't studied physics in college, but my good friend had. I wasn't sure if physics even worked the same here if magic existed.

And wasn't that just a mind-fuck and a half.

It was probably around 3 in the morning when I finally fell asleep. My mind felt like a hive of bees was buzzing around it.

Too many thoughts were flashing through my mind, crisscrossing and interrupting one another too quickly to follow one idea to its' conclusion. Too many things to factor in.

At one point I had convinced myself that I was not going to get involved at all. Maybe that was super selfish of me, but I certainly didn't feel like it was my place to be dragged into a war I had nothing to do with.

But there was a reason all those stupid online quizzes had always sorted me into Gryffindor.

I just didn't think I could live with myself if I didn't do anything. There wasn't really a guarantee of my safety either way, was there? And I was involved just by virtue of now being magical.

I wasn't a genius. I didn't know how to manipulate people so that the right things happened. I was just one person, and I was at a severe disadvantage. I knew that if nothing else, I was going to need to talk to someone. I needed more advice and help than I cared to admit. This was bigger than just me.

Before this I'd just been a woman trudging along at a stupid call center job and struggling to pay her student loans back. Then I was a struggling artist in another time period. Sure, logic kept failing me, but I had had a fresh start. It was almost like an adventure.

If I was going to approach someone I was going to have to be smart about it.

Dumbledore was the obvious choice. There was no way I couldn't include him, no matter how I decided to look at it. He was the one person who could help me, who had the power, respect, and contacts to help me. However I was equally as sure that he shouldn't be the only person I approached.

Part of the problem was that anything I knew about this world and the people in it was colored by Harry Potter's point of view as written in JKR's books. You know, that stupid meme ripped from tumblr or reddit that went something like Harry being as observant as a brick wall? The kid hadn't realized he was a wizard for fuck's sake. Or that one of his best friends was time traveling, or that the Half Blood Prince had the same handwriting as the Professor who had marked up his essays for the past six years…

How on earth was I supposed to work with that? Harry named his kids after two men who manipulated and lied to him his entire life. I didn't exactly trust his judgement.

And who was to say she had even gotten the story entirely accurately? Maybe there was another dimension out there that was just slightly different and that was the one she had written the books about. That wasn't too far-fetched to me. My grandmother existed here but my mother did not. That little fact kept bugging me.

Dumbledore could be straight here for all I knew. Or married to McGonagall. Probably not, but the point was that I had no clue, and it was stupid of me to think that I knew exactly how everything was going to go down. I needed the advice of someone who did know.

And that was the rub of it. I needed help. I needed to learn how to be a witch, or the magic would end up using me. I needed help assimilating and finding work. I didn't have enough money to find a tutor who wouldn't ask weird questions. I couldn't go to just anyone without attracting notice.

I really wanted to fly below the radar. I wanted protection when Voldemort showed up.

The only good thing was that I had plenty of time to prepare. Years in fact. You know, if the books were indeed accurate at all.

So I needed to somehow contact Dumbledore. I even had a good idea of how to attract his attention. I'm sure he got dozens of letters, but I needed to catch his interest and take me seriously.

So I decided to use a plain envelope and lined note paper.

* * *

 

Dear Professor Dumbledore,

My name is Alexandra Hughes. I'm in a bit of a bind. I'm not sure what to write exactly only that I must speak to you. I cannot understate the importance of this. I know you have two already in your possession, but I know where the third is. However the other matters I must speak to you about are more monumental than the title that goes with those items. I apologize for being cryptic. I hope to hear from you soon so we can arrange a time and place to meet. I am currently residing in London and unable to travel far.

Sincere Regards,

Alexandra Hughes

* * *

 

At the bottom of the letter I drew a circle and placed an uppercase R inside it. On the envelope I drew a large triangle with a circle and a line down the center. Finally I addressed it and then sealed the letter.

I doubted he would be able to resist his curiosity upon seeing the symbol of the hallows. I had dropped just enough info to hopefully get him to respond, but nothing that would make sense to anyone else who might see it. Also, the fact that I was writing this with obviously muggle tools should be strange enough to catch his eye.

I still wasn't sure about the second person. I didn't dare contact Shape. Though I knew enough about his backstory to drop some hints and catch his attention, he wasn't exactly the most stable or patient character and he was beholden to Dumbledore in a way that could be dangerous to me.

Most of the order were ridiculously loyal to Dumbledore or were too risky. Mad Eye was a wild card and I couldn't risk contacting him. McGonagall was too much under his thumb as well. The Weasleys were also out. They weren't exactly rolling in wealth and influence and they were firmly in Dumbledore's pocket.

But maybe...I needed someone who was intelligent, who could help me with magic, and who had not much else going on in their life. Someone who had some reason to mistrust Dumbledore, at least a little bit, but who was undoubtedly good. Someone who had secrets and a backstory I knew. I could think of at least one man who fit that bill. Actually I could think of two, but one was currently in Azkaban.

But Remus Lupin wasn't. I wasn't sure where he was exactly at this moment in history, but he was intelligent, kind, and I knew enough about him. He would help me stand up to Dumbledore if I revealed enough. He probably would believe me too. Unless I had gotten his character entirely wrong.

I couldn't continue to be hung up on that though. Either things would be mostly like I knew them to be, or they wouldn't. Either way I had decided that I couldn't just hide away like a coward and do nothing.

I had one bit of information that would definitely light a fire under his ass. And I didn't think it would change to plot for the worse. If anything, it could help quite a bit.

I took out another piece of paper and started to write. I mostly kept the letter the same as the one to Dumbledore.

* * *

 

Dear Moony,

My name is Alexandra Hughes and I'm in a bit of a bind. I'm not sure what to write exactly only that I must speak to you. I cannot understate the importance of this. I know the rat and where you can find him. Padfoot was poorly done by and we need to manage the mischief that's been done to him. However the other matters I must speak to you about are even more important. I apologize for being cryptic. I hope to hear from you soon so we can arrange a time and place to meet. I am currently residing in London and unable to travel far.

Sincere Regards,

Alexandra Hughes

* * *

 

As with Dumbledore's letter, I drew a picture on the bottom. A Stag, a Dog, a Wolf, and a Rat. I drew the rat standing a bit apart from the others and with a missing toe. If he was as smart as I thought he was, he would get it.

I drew antlers, a dog print, a full moon, and a rat tail in miniature on the envelope, which I addressed to him directly.

Maybe the doodles were a bit much, but I didn't want to be ignored. I was probably going to alarm both of them quite a bit with my letters, but it couldn't be helped. In fact, I wanted them alarmed. Alarm often incites action. I needed them to act.

I called out of work next. I had too many other things to do. Including shifting my huge stash of cash to Gringotts. I stuffed everything into my backpack and headed back to the Leaky Cauldron. I slipped the wand I had bought yesterday into my pocket warily. It seemed better to have it on me even if I didn't know how to use it.

It was just a short tube ride away from my apartment with some walking and soon I was entering the darkened and quiet establishment. Tom, the bartender greeted me and inquired whether I was there for breakfast as I hesitated in the doorway.

It was still early but I was reminded by my grumbling stomach that I hadn't eaten so I ordered some food. Pumpkin juice wasn't as sweet as I was somehow expecting it to be. I paid with my last bit of wizarding money and then sat around pretending to organize my bag until I saw someone else head for the back door. I followed them and watched as the harried looking witch tapped the stones above the garbage cans with her wand.

I hadn't remembered the sequence, but now that I had it I could come and go just fine. I had always had a good memory. The archway melted into existence and I once again headed straight for the white marble facade of the bank.

I deposited most of my money, but changed a significant chunk into galleons for shopping. I had plenty of that to do. Let's face it, who wouldn't go shopping in Diagon Alley if they had the chance to?

Scouting out the post office was easy enough. I paid for two Owls and sent my letters off. Hopefully I'd hear back soon.

Then I went shopping. Mostly I browsed, but I bought a plain set of robes and one nicer set from a second hand shop. I picked up a wand holster for my waist. It was uncomfortable keeping it in my pocket and I kept imagining setting myself on fire by accidentally brushing it and causing sparks.

I might have a bit of a morbid imagination.

I also splurged on a trunk with undetectable extension charms and multiple compartments. It shrunk and had featherlight charms on it. Very useful since I was going to have to vacate my apartment soon. All my purchases fit in easily. A tap of my wand in the right spot and it shrunk down small enough to fit in my pocket.

It was the first bit of magic I'd performed intentionally with it and for half a second I was sure it wouldn't work, but it did. The shopkeeper taught me how to set a password so it would only open to me and also how to switch it to a muggle friendly setting.

I then looked at the Quidditch shop, but the price of even a cheap broomstick made me blanch. I poked around the apothecary but didn't dare buy anything. Everything was so fascinating. I hadn't loved shopping before but with such interesting strange and marvelous things at every turn I couldn't help but be enthralled.

Next I picked up the Standard Book of Spells Grade 1 from Flourish and Blotts. I figured it would be a good place to start and it was one of the few textbooks I remembered from the series.

Lastly I checked out the owl emporium. It wasn't necessary, but I wanted an owl. There was a sound of rustling feathers and soft hoots as I opened the door. All around various owls sat on perches or in cages. The shopkeeper was busy with someone else so I just walked along the shop and looked.

There was a cute little brown owl with bright eyes but it was a bit too small for my tastes. Barn owls looked creepy in my opinion, so I avoided the ones out. As I walked through the shop, one owl tucked into the corner caught my eye. It was huge and light grey in color with intelligent looking yellow eyes. It stared at me and shuffled a bit on it's stand.

"Hello there," I greeted it. To my surprise the owl hooted back.

"He's a bit temperamental." The shop keeper's voice startled me. The owl narrowed his eyes at the man who stood next to me.

"Seems nice enough." I replied, amused. The owl seemed to preen at my words.

"Oh he's quite intelligent, though a bit unusual. Largest species of owl you know, the Great Grey." He said cheerfully.

I held out a hand and the owl looked at it for a moment before nipping my thumb and then butting my hand with his head. I obediently scratched gently and the owl cooed, his eyes closing. The feathers were silky beneath my fingers.

The shopkeeper reached out an arm but the owl disdained it and turned his head away from the man.

I smiled. "Hey handsome, want to go home with me?" I asked and the owl seemed to consider the question.

"Oof!" I said as he launched off the perch suddenly and landed on my shoulder. He was heavy!  
He chittered almost scoldingly and fluttered his wings to adjust his balance as I adjusted to the extra weight.

"It'd be a stupid bloke that'd refuse such an invitation." The shopkeeper told me with a grin. I blushed furiously.

"Well, I thought I'd be choosing an owl but seems like he chose me. How much?" I asked.

Altogether the owl and all proper care items took up the biggest chunk of money I spent but I considered it well worth it.

The owl refused to be carried in the cage, so I unshrunk my new trunk and placed everything in it. He continued riding my shoulder as I left the shop. His talons pricked my shoulder through my top, but he seemed content to stay there and play with my hair.

"Since you're a Grey Owl, your name is now Gandalf." I told him solemnly, he eyed me suspiciously but otherwise seemed to accept it.

I left the alley as easily as I'd entered, and decided to head back home for a late lunch. I hesitated at the door. I couldn't haul Gandalf through muggle London without getting in trouble. I'm pretty sure you'd need a license to have a pet owl. Certainly you did where I'd lived in the States and I didn't think that was a new rule. Plus it would bring me attention I didn't want.

"I know I just got you and all but I'm going to need you to catch up with me." I told him, and he nipped my ear in reprimand. "Ow! Can't you just, like follow me? I don't want someone to take you from me." I said.

He didn't seem too happy about parting from me so soon but he hooted and took off, making sure to smack my head with a wing as he did so. I had a feeling I had chosen a bit of a smart ass for an owl.

If anyone thought it odd that a large grey owl was following me through the streets, none remarked on it. He swooped down occasionally in front of me, but mostly kept high enough I would have had to crane my neck to keep him in sight.

"You could have been a bit more discreet." I sighed, as he settled on my shoulder just outside my apartment.

His reply hoot seemed smug.

"You're a bit vindictive, aren't you?" I muttered, and received a peck on the head for my trouble.

I had thought that hopefully I'd hear back from Dumbledore or Remus soon, but I hadn't thought I'd hear back as soon as I did.

Gandalf woke me with a god awful screech that startled me so badly that I fell out of bed.

"Ouch!" I fought free of the blankets and rubbed my smarting side.

"What?" I asked my owl grouchily, and he hooted back in disgruntlement, flying a circle around my head and then flying out to my living room.

A hoot from the hallway had me following him and I found the problem.

"Oh!" I rushed forward and let another hovering owl fly inside. A second swooped in after the first. Gandalf settled on the back of a chair and a large brown owl flew straight to the counter. A screech owl settled itself on my table.

Gandalf continued giving the other owls the evil eye as I untied the letters from first one and then the other. I offered the animals some water which they both accepted.

The owls seemed inclined to wait, much to Gandalf's disgruntlement and I took that to mean that the were waiting for replies from me.

I opened the first parchment envelope with shaky hands. Inside was a letter and I quickly read it. Then re-read it.

My heart pounded and I swallowed as my mouth ran dry. It was everything I'd hoped for.

* * *

 

Dear Miss Hughes,

As doubtless was your intention, you have caught my attention. I think it best we meet somewhere soon. As luck would have it I will be in London on business tomorrow. If it is convenient I would invite you to join me at the Leaky Cauldron for tea at two in the afternoon.

Sincerely,

Albus Dumbledore

* * *

 

I laid aside the first letter and then opened the next.

* * *

 

Dear Miss Hughes,

Although I do not know you it seems that you know me quite well. I would like to meet as soon as possible. I know a little cafe in Muggle London that should suffice. It is called the Pie Shoppe located at the corner of Russel Ave and Kendall St. Will 9 o'clock in the morning tomorrow work for you?

Sincerely,

Remus Lupin

* * *

 

Relief course through me, because Remus was the one I had to meet with first. In case Dumbledore decided to erase my memory or somehow manipulate me into something I did not want. I needed him in my corner.

As both times and locations worked out well for me, I hunted down a pen and hastily scribbled a confirmation to both of them and sent the letters off.

Gandalf hooted irritably as the other two owls winged away. I scratched his head soothingly and he seemed to mollified.

A nervous energy had run down into my stomach and now I felt anxious and restless. I still had things to do though, so I called up work again and spoke with my boss Linda.

After exchanging pleasantries I sighed and got down to business.

"You know you've done a lot for me and I'm really grateful. I hate to do this last minute but I need some time off." I twirled the phone cord around my fingers nervously as I said this.

"Is everything okay honey?"

"I'm fine. Just some things came up I wasn't expecting. I'm not sure I will be coming back actually. Might have another opportunity coming up with my art." I lied.

"Oh that's so great! I can't say I'll be happy to see you go. You're a hard worker. Just keep in touch, alright? Karen has been asking for more shifts so I'll give her the rest of yours this week. But you'll always have a job here if you want it."

"That means a lot. Thanks Linda."

"You wouldn't bail on us for no good reason. You're a good kid."

I swallowed past a lump in my throat.

"I'll keep in touch."

"And I want a signed picture one day when you get famous!"

I laughed, "You got it. Whatever you want."

She wished me luck and I said goodbye and hung up.

I was going to have to move somewhere magical and I had a deadline. I had some savings. I would be okay for a little while without a job. I knew if things went well I wasn't going to be able to keep working at the cafe. I'd be too busy. Besides, I needed a Wizarding job.

Even if things didn't go well, I didn't want to draw Linda into the problems in my life. It was dangerous. She was a genuinely good person and there were so few of those.

The meetings tomorrow made me nervous, but I still had so much to do. So much to prepare for. I needed to figure out where the location of that cafe was for one, and how to get there. I missed Google with a fierce vengeance. I missed my smartphone. But I'd been living in the past for awhile now and I was old enough to remember how to do things without modern technology anyhow.

Being as this was a tourist-y city, there were plenty of free maps dotted here and there all around if one knew where to look for them. I didn't live in a tourist area, but I could easily get to one. While I was out I also went and picked up a nice outfit. A brand new one. First impressions mattered after all. My second-hand thrift shop finds might be alright for every day, but I knew I didn't look the best. I could have worn the robes I had gotten the day before, but I would feel horribly out of place.

I needed to be as comfortable as possible. It would help my anxiety and it would help me seem more confident than I was. I also splurged on a haircut. I'd been putting off getting one for awhile anyway.

I picked up a map of the city and looked it over while having lunch at a sandwich shop. The streets Remus had mentioned were quite a ways from me, but still easily reachable by public transport. Just a few blocks from one of the train stations actually.

Being the paranoid person I was, I went straight there to check it out ahead of time. It was just a small pastry shop with a few tables out front. Nothing special. I left again after only a few moments.

I'd spent most of the day running about doing errands, but I wasn't done yet. I still had to visit the realtor in Diagon Alley. I made an appointment for later in the week and I also picked up listings of properties available to rent. Scanning through the list made my stomach fall. They were a lot more expensive than I had thought. I suppose because there weren't that many wizarding communities, despite being a small population, property was at a premium. I also picked up some information on warding homes in muggle areas but getting that done was almost as expensive as finding a new place…

It was a problem I'd have to deal with another time. I still had things to do today.

I couldn't help but be drawn to the bookstore again. I needed a job, and I was an artist, but I new next to nothing about wizarding art. I browsed the few books they had on the subject and bought one on wizarding portraits and another on wizarding art history.

Thoroughly tired, I got back to my place and I ordered takeout. I was too tired to cook and besides I was low on groceries. While I waited for my food to arrive, I opened up the Standard Book of Spells.

It was written for children, but it was fascinating. I hadn't cracked a textbook in years, but I had always been a good student. I started underlining things, writing out questions, and taking notes.

There was a lot more to magic than just waving a wand and saying some nonsensical words. There was real theory behind various wand movements, intention, and pronunciation.

I was so tempted to take out my wand and try a few. I had almost decided to do so when the bell rang and I had to go get my food. I had gotten distracted by magic, but I had meant to start figuring out what I was going to say to Remus and Dumbledore tomorrow.

I pulled out a notepad and started scribbling ideas down as I ate my curry distractedly.

When it grew so late that I could barely keep awake I set an alarm so I could be awake and on time. Anxiety was eating away at me, but I had no choice but to follow through now with what I'd set in motion.

It was also exciting. I'll admit that. For all the potential of things to go horribly wrong, I was meeting the first two actual book characters who were important.

I fell asleep wondering if Dumbledore's eyes really twinkled.


	5. Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I didn't expect such a quick turn around but you guys really inspired me :) I definitely think Remus is one of my favorite characters.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. Definitely not. I just write this for fun.

Remus Lupin was tired and worn out.

He was always tired and worn out. It was his perpetual state of being ever since...well…

He worked shitty jobs that he was always losing due to poor attendance. His house was just as worn down as the rest of him since he was unable to do the upkeep the way it should be done and magic could only go so far.

He was in-between jobs at the moment. Which was just as well since the last full moon had been particularly hard on him. He really ought to go out today and look for a job. He ought to patch that hole in the roof. He really ought to get rid of the doxies in the attic. He really ought to do a lot of things, but somehow he didn't have the energy to do them.

He stared at his favorite chipped mug which had cooled coffee in it. He ought to get up out of this chair, dump the cold stuff, and wash the mug. Still, he simply sat there staring at it. The armchair he sat in sagged, and his hair was unwashed. His bathrobe had another hole in it. All things he ought to do something about but couldn't be bothered to.

How much more time passed he couldn't guess, but eventually a tapping on the kitchen window roused him from his lethargy.

He wasn't expecting post. Few enough people wrote to him these days and the Prophet had already been delivered.

Still he let the owl in and noticed with surprise the muggle envelope tied to its' leg. He offered the bird some of the toast he hadn't been able to finish for breakfast and some water.

It was indeed addressed to him. Then he noticed the picture on the corner and suddenly the lethargy that had been plaguing him for the past week vanished. His heart beat faster as he traced the antlers, the moon, and the tail. He hesitated tracing the paw print. Who on earth could have sent this? Nobody knew about...well, nobody who would be writing to him.

He hastily reached for his wand and slit the envelope open. Lined paper fell out. He smoothed the letter flat on the counter.

The first thing his eyes fell on was another doodle, and the odd depiction of Wormtail…

Alexandra Hughes, it was signed, though he did not know her. He didn't recognize it as a wizarding name either. His eyes turned to reading the words, now anxious. Who was this person and what did she want?

His hands were shaking by the time he finished and he stumbled into the nearest chair, accidentally banging into the table and upsetting the fruit bowl. The owl squawked, startled from his uncoordinated movements.

Remus paid it no mind. His head was spinning. Who on earth was this woman? How did she know? What was she implying?

The missing finger!

Remus had had his doubts, but he'd been in so much shock after James and Lily died...and then to lose Peter so soon after. Little Harry out of his reach... Sirius had always been impulsive and his family had definitely passed down dark knowledge.

But to think there was a possibility of innocence! That Peter might be alive! Before Sirius had been thrown in Azkaban he'd have sworn he would never in a million years would have betrayed James and Lily.

But Peter...he was the only one who could have. Hot anger surged forth, and had to drop the letter or risk tearing it. What was the point?! Of smearing one name and proclaiming the innocence of another? What other things did she want to tell him? Was it all a lie? But how could she know?

Too many emotions rippled through him and he shuddered. He didn't know what to think. He'd felt mixed about Sirius for years. But in the end it hadn't mattered. He had no proof of anything. He couldn't even help Harry. He didn't know if he had even wanted to help Sirius, and everyone else had been dead.

Well what choice did he have now? He stumbled back to the living room to fetch a quill and some parchment and hastily scribbled a reply. He had to meet this person. To see what she wanted. To know.

Because if she had proof, then he had to do something. He hadn't been able to do something before, but if she knew more than him, somehow. Well. She must. Even if she didn't, he owed it to James and Lily to check.

He stumbled back to the kitchen with the letter and acciod some money to pay the post owl to deliver it. He watched the bird fly away through the window, his hands clenching convulsively.

Pain made him glace down at them and he saw that clutched in his left hand was the mug of cold coffee. He dumped in in the sink with a hoarse chuckle and went to go get dressed properly.

* * *

I got there early. Partly because I was nervous and partly because I wanted to be there before him. I wasn't sure if he'd look like the actor or not...and anyway he'd be younger than when Harry had met him.

I hesitated, for the first time it had occurred to me that I am probably closest in age to Remus Lupin and his contemporaries. How strange.

The cafe was doing pretty good business and they had a good selection of pastries. It seemed fairly popular and was packed inside.

My eyes landed on one in particular and I smiled and ordered two. I also ordered some coffee for myself and then took my paper bag and cup outside. I just managed to snag a table as another person was leaving.

From there I watched people on the street and tried to figure out which one might be Remus Lupin.

I ended up knowing him the moment I saw him round the corner. He was near my age but scars and wrinkles had already made his face look weathered. It was the facial scars that made me realize it was him. He had several faint lines down one cheek and his neck.

He didn't look like the actor except very generally. He also had sandy light brown hair and an air of perpetual tiredness about him. He was thinner and lankier and quite a bit taller than I had imagined.

"Mr. Lupin?" I called out as he approached, and he looked slightly startled at my appearance. Before I had called out his eyes had just slid over me so I was clearly not what he'd been expecting. His one hand was gripping something tightly in his pocket and his blue eyes were wary. He had paused on the sidewalk and he didn't say anything in reply.

My own stomach was full of nerves but I tried to move past it and smiled my best smile. I stood and held out a hand, "Alexandra Hughes."

He seemed to remember himself then and he reached out to shake my hand. "Remus Lupin, but you already knew that." He said. The handshake was brief, his hands calloused.

I laughed nervously. Then for a lack of anything else to say, I gestured towards the shop. "Did you want…?"

"No, I'd rather talk to you about your letter. If you don't mind." He was cooler in attitude than I expected and the smile slid from my face.

"I supposed you would. Why don't we walk then? There's a park nearby. It's a bit busy here." I suggested nervously.

We walked side by side in the way only strangers do. In silence and warily checking one another out. My hands were occupied with my paper bag, which I crinkled and smoothed nervously between my fingers.

By unspoken agreement we entered the small park and headed towards a shady bench. There weren't many people about this early on a weekday. It was the perfect spot for a chat about things that were delicate. I settled uncomfortably on one end, angling to face him. He did the same, crossing his arms uncomfortably.

He waved a hand and suddenly the sounds around us were muted. I blinked at this display of wandless and nonverbal magic but he merely looked at me expectantly.

"So you probably have lots of questions." I began, lamely.

"That's a mild way to put it." He replied, pulling out something from his pocket. I recognized my letter as he smoothed it out and tapped the drawing at the bottom.

"I do indeed have lots of questions." He said, but seemed to be more absorbed in the drawing. He traced the deer and the rat, avoiding the dog and the wolf.

"You're a good artist. It's a surprising likeness." He said after a moment, studying my face intensely.

I cleared my throat, feeling my face heat. "Well, I uh, I am an artist. I mean, I draw and paint and stuff." I winced. Strangely, a bit of the coolness suddenly bled from his body language.

"You must really be in a bind." Remus said, looking at me more thoughtfully after another moment.

"I do need help." I admitted, "But before I get into it, I have to apologize. It couldn't have been easy getting this letter, and I knew that when I sent it, but I needed your attention."

A ghost of a smile lifted the corners of his mouth, "You definitely got it." Then he sighed and a weight seemed to settle on his shoulders.

"So is any of what you wrote true? How can he still be alive? Do you have idea what…?" He trailed off as I nodded solemnly.

"Padfoot is innocent." I said, "And Wormtail is currently hiding with a Wizarding family as their pet."

He flinched when I said their names, and his hand went for his pocket. I stiffened but held my breath and didn't move. I relaxed a bit when he withdrew his hand again, looking lost and a bit surprised at his own reaction.

"I simply can't put it together. Nobody should know those names. I didn't know what to think when I got this. I half thought it was some cruel joke." He folded the letter back up and tucked it away again.

He caught my eyes, "But you don't seem like you're playing a trick. You're not trying to withhold information or blackmail me. Are you a seer?"

I waved my hands in front of me, "No, no, definitely not! It would be easier if I was! But I'm not!" I denied.

Then I slumped, "At least I don't think I am."

He raised an eyebrow at that.

"It's complicated and honestly I don't know where to begin. You're going to think I'm crazy." I said nervously, crumpling the paper bag some more in my hands.

"Well you are an American." Remus said offhandedly,

"I was not expecting that at all."

"And Americans are automatically crazy?" I asked, a bit flustered, and slightly offended.

He looked me up and down, "American wizards are very different. Very backwards rules MACUSA had until recently."

"I'm not exactly an American witch, not in the way you're thinking." I replied, a bit mollified.

Remus sighed, "Maybe you'd better start at the beginning."

"I'm not from this world." I blurted out, and Remus scoffed.

"I take it back, you are crazy." He said after a moment, crossing his arms again.

"I can't really prove it except that I know things nobody should, like what I wrote in the letter." I said, a pleasing note entering my voice.

Remus narrowed his eyes, "Which hasn't been proved yet. You could still be making it up."

I paused, not sure how to continue. Then recklessly I plunged ahead.

"I know Fenrir Greyback was the werewolf who turned you as a child. You are a halfblood. James Potter referred to your condition as "your furry little problem". You were friends with Peter first. You spent transformations in the Shrieking Shack while at Hogwarts."

Remus had gone pale the moment I had finished the first sentence and his eyes were wide as I continued, "Sirius sent Severus Snape after you once and it only contributed to the feud the Marauders and him had. James intervened and they saved him last minute. You love chocolate. Your friends became illegal animagi to help you with on nights of the full moon. You're afraid of passing on your condition to any future children. You helped invent the Marauder's Map which shows everyone at Hogwarts and quite a few secret passageways in the castle. It was confiscated by Argus Filch and I think is still currently in his office. The way to get to the Shack is by pressing a knot on the Whomping Willow."

I took a deep breath and then continued, "James and Lily had their house secret protected, but you weren't in on it because they knew someone was spying on the order and they suspected you might have turned. The secret keeper was Sirius, but they changed it to Peter, thinking nobody would suspect him. But he betrayed them."

Remus was shaking now, with anger or grief I wasn't sure. I kept going.

"Sirius never got a trial. He said it was his fault, but that's only because he urged them to trust Peter. Peter fled because he knew Sirius and you would kill him. So he framed Sirius and escaped as a rat, leaving behind only-"

"His finger." Remus said, voice tightly controlled with anger. I nodded and opened my mouth, but he raised a hand suddenly, cutting me off. "How? How do you know all this?" His blue eyes were intense as they locked on mine.

"I read it. In a book. Or well, a book series." I said, watching the shock go across his face, "They're one of the most popular series in the world. They're called the Harry Potter books."

"Don't you see I couldn't possibly know, how could I? I know much more that you're not even aware of. I read it. I read it in the books." I said helplessly.

"I don't know what to think." Remus said. He rubbed his face, "I didn't even know some of that. But as for the rest, it's impossible. You shouldn't know all of that."

I hugged my arms around my body, "I shouldn't even be here. I just appeared, you know? I was minding my own business, and then I was just here. I didn't even know I was in the Harry Potter world. I thought I'd gone back in time…"

I hiccuped as I started to tear up, and Remus listened to me quietly. "And the craziest thing is that I am now magical. Magic didn't exist as far as I know, back in my world. But things started combusting around me and the DMLE came knocking and it just sort of spilled out."

I was crying now, and Remus surprisingly laid a hand on my arm as I continued.

"I thought I was crazy. I'm still not sure that I'm not, because how can this be real? How can I be a part of one of my favorite book series? It just doesn't make sense!" I cried, and pulled away from him.

"Why reach out to me?" Remus asked quietly, as I sniffled and wiped my tears away.

"You're supposed to be kind, intelligent, and I knew stuff about you. And I want to change things that happened in the books. Some of it was, will be, bad. Very bad. I just couldn't do nothing."

I smiled tearfully, "I was sorted Gryffindor in all the quizzes fans and the author made up you know."

That surprised a bark of laughter from Remus. But then he sighed, "I just don't know what to think. Who else did you reach out to?"

"Professor Dumbledore. I'm supposed to meet him later today. I know things that he only suspects...about Harry and Voldemort. I reached out to you too though, because I don't think it's right that only one man should have all the cards. I'm vulnerable. I need someone on my side too and I don't completely trust him." I looked away, "A lot of people suffered because he made decisions for them. Harry suffers. And I don't think all of it was necessary."

Remus blanched when I mentioned Voldemort, but didn't look surprised. "So he wasn't completely defeated. And you trust me?"

"I don't think Dumbledore is bad exactly, just that he works for the greater good and sometimes people get hurt because of it. You have reasons to push back against him a bit." I said.

"Do I?" He asked faintly, looking a bit shell-shocked.

I shrugged, "He could have used his influence to get Sirius a trial, or at least investigate what happened more closely. He didn't. I'm sure you also want to make sure Harry gets the best possible life he can as well."

"Of course." Remus said, running a hand through his hair, "Of course. It's just so unbelievable."

I fell silent for a minute as he processed what I'd said so far. He was staring off into the distance, hand over his mouth, eyes tight.

I continued. "I don't know how to be a witch. I got a wand, but I don't know the first thing about magic. I was fined for having accidental magic outbursts and I'm supposed to move. But I don't know where to start and I don't want to bring attention to myself."

"It's not fair of me to ask you, or anyone, but please. I need help." I said softly.

"So this isn't completely unselfish." Remus laughed, with an edge of hysteria.

"You've completely undone my world view in less than an hour Miss Hughes. I still don't know what to really think." Remus said.

"Say you'll help me. Say you'll help me get Sirius out of Azkaban. Put Peter there where he belongs." I begged.

He kept silent and my heart dropped a bit. I knew it wouldn't be easy, but I think I'd stunned him a bit more than I had anticipated. Luckily, I had a backup plan for that.

"Chocolate croissant?" I offered, holding out the paper bag after a moment.

He looked at me incredulously and I blushed.

Then, to my surprise, he reached out and removed the pastry from the bag.

"You really do know me quite well." He said, biting into the sweet after sniffing it curiously. Having the food seemed to bring him out of his shock a bit.

"I could have poisoned that." I replied, nonplussed that he had actually just gone right ahead and eaten it.

"Would have been a shame to poison chocolate. Something only somebody evil would do. You don't strike me as evil." He replied in between bites of the croissant.

I pulled out the other one and bit into it. "I'm really not. I just want what everyone else does. A good life. And if I can help others on the way, then I should."

"Fair enough." Remus replied, wiping crumbs from his hands. "Let's get started on that then."

I looked at him hopefully and he sighed, "I think I better go with you to this meeting with Albus."

"Oh." I said, surprised.

"I'm still not sure I believe you, but Albus is a good judge of things like that, and perhaps we can do something about proving whether you're right, or wrong."

He looked me in the eye then, "And if it's true, then not only are you in significant danger, but you are a potential threat. I can't possibly let you out of my sight."

He looked away then, a hint of anger creeping back into his voice, "Besides, I have some questions of my own for the Professor."

I blinked. Then I reached for the holster at my waist. Remus stilled and went for his own wand, but I merely undid the holster and handed it to him.

"I don't know how to use it anyway, and maybe you would feel better holding on to it." I explained.

He took it from me, a puzzled expression on his face. "No witch would ever give up their wand willingly."

"Until very recently, I wasn't a witch." I said wearily. "You don't trust me, and I get that, I really do. So I'm putting the power in your hands, literally. Make of it what you will."

"You really _do_ trust me." Remus said wonderingly. He pocketed my wand, and despite having willingly given it up and never having used it much, I felt a pang of loss.

"So what now? It's still several hours before I'm supposed to meet with Dumbledore." I asked.

"Now you tell me a bit more of what you know." Remus said, looking at me seriously. I swallowed down my nervousness and nodded.

"Alright."


	6. Assessing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Goodness me, you guys have been very encouraging about this story. I'm a little surprised. I have no intention of abandoning it and I hope you'll forgive me my occasional lapse in updating frequently! If you like OC-inserts I also have a Hobbit one called "A Certain Slant of Light" under the name DollFinChick and it's a lot further along than this story.
> 
> At any rate, enjoy! Keep sending me feedback and comments!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

Albus Dumbledore got a great deal of mail on any given day. Being famous and commanding respect among the Wizarding community did that to a man.

Although he did not often read all his correspondence the very day he got it, especially when the letters were from people he did not know, the strange muggle envelope caught his eye.

It wasn't unheard of for a muggleborn student's parents to send a letter in such a way, but it wasn't just the odd materials that had caught his eye.

He traced the symbol of the Hallows thoughtfully. He hadn't devoted much time to tracking down the stone recently. He already had two of the Hallows currently in his possession. But very few people knew of his academic interest in the subject.

Very few put much stock into fairy tales and myths and the Hallows were written off as a legend by many.

So who could possibly be writing to him?

Curiosity aroused, he slit open the envelope and read the letter.

His old heart beat a bit faster in his chest. The last Hallow...well it was that one in particular that he had sought but hadn't the faintest clue as to its' whereabouts. To be able to speak with…to seek forgiveness... He'd dedicated his whole life to the atonement of past mistakes.

As for the rest of the letter. Hm. Curious. Very curious. This person was obviously quite desperate for his attention. More curious was that they knew exactly how to get it, when not many would know the significance of the symbols, nor that it was almost guaranteed to catch his eye.

He couldn't help but feel a little wary when reading the name. He didn't recognize it, and being the Headmaster at Hogwarts for so long, an upstanding member of the Wizarding community, and a teacher before that, had given him opportunity to recognize most names. He never forgot a student.

In addition to that, he had a feeling that whatever the other monumental things she wanted to speak with him about were indeed quite serious. It was approaching the time when Harry Potter would be starting at Hogwarts too...not that that necessarily had to do with this, but these coincidences tended to stack up.

He'd learned to trust his gut instincts.

Remus Lupin was a good listener. When we retreated to another cafe, he told me to tell him what I could after raising another privacy charm.

So I did. I didn't go into a lot of detail. I wasn't sure if that was wise yet. But I told him that there was a prophecy that involved Harry and Voldemort's downfall, and that Voldemort was sure to return again. I also told him there was a way to defeat him, though I didn't tell him exactly how. I also told him we could possibly prevent his return.

I think he knew I wasn't telling him everything. He didn't push me for more details, though I saw him piecing things together in his head.

"A lot of what I know hasn't even happened yet." I tried to explain, "I've gone and changed it now, though some details are probably right, it won't turn out the same. And that's assuming the books I know were entirely accurate."

He nodded and continued to listen.

I told him how I needed a teacher, because I was having uncontrolled magical outbursts. I explained how I didn't want to be involved more than necessary.

"Only a very few should even know about me." I said, "What I know is very dangerous. Even if things change, I know too much. I just know the people involved and their backstories too well." He nodded again and waved at me to continue.

When I had finished outlining the bare basics of what Harry would go through, Remus leaned back in his seat and looked tired.

"I can see why you decided to approach someone else. If even a fraction of that is true. Changing things is too much for a single person to manage." He said, and then tilted his head back to look at me thoughtfully.

"We could have done worse than to have someone like you." I blushed and waved a hand. "I'm not really great. I just am a nerd who likes to read."

Remus smiled tiredly, "Well what makes you think that isn't precisely what is needed?"

I coughed and hid my face behind my cup of tea.

"I'm willing to help you. Provided we prove a few points in your story." Remus said, after a few more moments.

I felt relief course through me, and I mumbled my gratitude. "I'll do my best." I sighed in reply.

* * *

I'm not sure what I expected when I met Dumbledore for the first time. If Remus hadn't been distracting me, I might have worked myself up into more of a panic attack. I should have known he would want to accompany me. I hadn't factored that into my plans.

I had to get used to these characters I'd read about being real people, with motivations I probably couldn't truly predict. It was dangerous, and probably very stupid to forget that.

We arrived before he did at any rate, and I secretly questioned the wisdom of meeting in so public a place, but then, who would know that I knew what I knew?

There was absolutely no reason for anyone to suspect anything about me. Despite my minor record at the DMLE, I was a nonentity. Only Remus knew at this point and he was sticking to me like white on rice.

He was more relaxed though, ever since I handed my wand over. He hadn't twitched towards his wand once since.

He carefully steered me to a corner booth, casually blocking anyone from getting too good a look at me with his taller frame.

He went to go have a word with the man at the bar while I sat by myself. I twisted my hands nervously over the worn wooden tabletop.

A bottle of something frothy and sweet smelling was plonked in front of me and Remus slid into the other side of the booth with his own cup of tea.

I sniffed the bottle. It smelled vaguely alcoholic. I raised an eyebrow at him.

Remus chuckled. "It's just Butterbeer. Shouldn't get anyone but a house elf tipsy and you're tenser than a piano wire."

Butterbeer! How could I have forgotten?

I took a cautious sip and then grinned. It tasted way different than any of the Butterbeer recipes I'd ever tried at various HP themed parties over the years. Vaguely creamy and butterscotch-y. But with an undertone like brandy. Sweet but not overpoweringly so.

I liked it, but I still went slow. Always a wise thing to do when trying a new intoxicant for the first time.

It was at that point that Albus Dumbledore walked into the room. I nearly choked on my Butterbeer at the sight of him.

Despite looking like every wizard cliche I could possibly think of, the man was also wearing lime green and purple robes with silver stars darting about the hems. He had a matching pointed hat and an incredibly long silver beard.

Sure I'd noticed wizards wore some odd fashions but this was beyond eccentric. It made my head hurt to look at him.

Despite his obvious age, he walked erect and confidently, yet somehow also unassumingly. I was sure he worked hard to project that image, of an eccentric loopy old man, but I couldn't imagine how anyone could fall for it after meeting his eyes.

He had very blue eyes. And they didn't seem to miss a thing. They twinkled with a light that told you he had lived long enough that the world was less mysterious and more amusing to him.

Despite the slightly batty air and strange clothes, this was a man of power and influence. People nodded to him in passing and he greeted them genially and with familiarity.

When he approached the table, Remus stood and reached out a hand "Albus. It's good to see you." He shook hands with the old Professor and I unclenched my fingers from my Butterbeer.

"Remus my dear boy, it's been too long! And Miss Hughes, I presume?" He said, glancing over at me, as I slid from the booth to stand in front of him. My hands trembled slightly but I held one out as well. We shook briefly and his hand was soft and wrinkled against mine. Despite my nervousness, the touch reassured me.

This man might be of mythical proportions in my own world. But he was still flesh and blood. Still just a man.

"It's good to meet you Professor." I said.

"I must admit, I did not expect to see Remus with you. Do you know Miss Hughes well?" Dumbledore asked.

"We're quite good friends actually." Remus lied, and then cast a significant look around. "How is Fawkes by the way?"

If Dumbledore thought this a strange question, he showed no sign of it except to look at me a little more closely over his half moon glasses. "Ah quite well. In his prime right now as it were."

Remus and Dumbledore exchanged a significant look. I wasn't sure what to say. What did one say in this situation? How in the world would this work? We couldn't possibly discuss everything here but I wasn't a spy or experienced in subterfuge.

"I do hope you'll forgive me," Dumbledore cut in to my rambling thoughts, "But I seem to have forgotten that book I came here to lend to you Miss Hughes. Perhaps you wouldn't mind following me back to Hogwarts? I think I just left it on my desk and we can have tea there quite comfortably as well. Remus, you are of course welcome to join us." Dumbledore smiled genially.

I tried not to look too relieved, "Of course. No trouble at all." I said, though my heart-beat sped up considerably. I hadn't planned on going to the school. I hadn't mentally prepared for that eventuality. But it didn't really matter. I didn't think they would harm me, not really. And wasn't that the safest possible place to discuss sensitive matters?

All this subterfuge made my brain hurt.

Remus accepted the invitation politely, as if he had nowhere else better to be, and the three of us made our way to a back room where a fireplace stood. The grate was blackened with ash and time but a small fire crackled merrily there. As I wondered what we were doing here, the fire turned bright green, making me take an alarmed step backwards, and spat out a man who nodded to us as he brushed dust from his robes, and then left the room.

Floo travel. Of course.

Dumbledore had not missed my reaction, and neither had Remus.

"I trust you know how to travel by Floo?" Remus asked me, looking a little worried.

"Of course, I just, never liked it much…" I said weakly.

Translation: I've never done it in my life and I'm more than a little terrified of doing it.

Dumbledore took in our short conversation with careful eyes, and patted me on the arm. "It can be a bit disconcerting for someone with vertigo. Luckily I've never suffered from that particular ailment, but I hear it can be quite serious." He said cheerfully.

What was with them, giving me an out every time I needed one?

"Precisely." I breathed out, trying to calm my stomach. Which did not like the idea of an unknown magical method of travel. I still hadn't forgotten apparition.

"I'll go first, shall I? That way I can make sure to have some tea ready when you arrive."

With that, he tossed some powder from the pot on the mantle into the flames, stepped in, and clearly said, "Hogwarts, Headmaster's Office!" and vanished with a woosh.

Remus turned towards me, and cocked his head, "Would you like me to go before you?" he asked.

"No, I'll go." I said, drawing on my sorely tried courage

. I grabbed a handful of the slightly glittery powder and tossed it in the fire. I stepped in without another second of hesitation. It was an odd sensation. I could tell there was fire there. I could feel the smoke and ash in the air, but it didn't burn me.

"Hogwarts, Headmaster's Office!" I called, and promptly lost my breath as the world spun. I didn't dare shut my eyes, although this was almost as bad as apparition. Instead of a kaleidoscope of colors and the sensation of being squeezed, I got glimpses of fireplaces and rooms and felt like I was spinning. The rooms were there and gone so fast not much registered beyond brief impressions. A flash of wood floor, a plaid couch, and a dirty green rug. I wasn't prepared for it when I was promptly spat out of the fire, but thankfully I managed to catch my balance and Dumbledore was there with a steadying hand.

I let him steady me as I coughed a bit, and belatedly brushed the dust from my clothes.

"Thanks." I said, though it came out scratchy. I definitely preferred muggle transportation.

"Why don't you come and sit here my dear." Dumbledore said, leading me to a purple armchair in front of a great desk. It was very plush and soft. I fought the urge to sink into it.

He settled down in the large chair behind the desk just as Remus came through the flames with a lot more grace than I thought was really fair.

I don't know why I had had the impression Lupin would be awkward in any way, except that he always seemed the quiet type of character who sat in a corner with his nose buried in a book. Instead I'd been noticing how very predator-like some of his movements were. Very graceful and assured. Not a movement was too hasty or carelessly made.

"Here is the promised tea," Dumbledore floated a teacup and saucer towards me. I took it carefully out of the air.

Remus sat in another purple squashy chair that Dumbledore conjured for him. He refused tea.

"Lemon drop?" Dumbledore, asked next, gesturing towards a candy dish.

I couldn't help it, I started to laugh. It was just too much. Too hysterical. Being in Hogwarts, the great Albus Dumbledore and his candy. Remus Lupin the werewolf sitting next to me.

Somewhere in my laughter, tears started coming down my cheeks instead, and Remus had taken my tea from me. Dumbledore was looking at me with concern, and I just couldn't stop crying. I buried my face in my hands as my emotions got the best of me and just sobbed.

I'd held it together for so long. I'd managed to rebuild a life when I was transported from my home to here. I had been deeply homesick and missed my family, but I had moved on. I had even taken magic in stride when it discovered me.

But this, finally being somewhere that was _safe_. The possibility of help, if not the promise of it, was enough to make me lose the steel in my spine. I wished desperately for a hug, but settled for hugging my arms around my chest. I had been so scared. I still was. But it had only really hit me now.

I had been so lonely. And though these were not people who knew me well, I knew them. I could hazard a better guess as to their reactions than any other stranger on the street. I didn't have to be so alone. Well, if I could impress upon them the importance of listening to and believing in me.

Dumbledore offered me a handkerchief, and Remus was now patting my shoulder as my sobs subsided. He was a good man. To offer comfort to a stranger like he had several times already. I needed to pull myself together.

I took the handkerchief.

"I-I'm sorry." I said, wiping my no doubt blotchy and swollen face.

Dumbledore merely smiled, "I daresay this won't be the last time someone breaks down in this office, and it certainly isn't the first."

I nodded, and twisted the handkerchief in my hands.

Dumbledore was giving me an assessing look over the top of his glasses.

"Well," he began, steepling his hands together in front of him, "It seems quite obvious to me that there is more afoot here than what you initially contacted me about in your letter." His eyes flicked to Remus, "I take it you are in fact not at all that well acquainted with this young woman here?"

"We met in person just today, though she also contacted me via a letter that I couldn't help but respond to." Remus confirmed, withdrawing it from his pocket and offering it to Dumbledore.

The Professor took it and began to read. I picked up my tea again and began to sip it. "I assume you know who the people mentioned in her missive are then. Now, my question, is why did you contact the two of us specifically, Miss Hughes?"

"I knew I could trust both of you, and I desperately need help." I said.

"She has, well, an almost unbelievable story." Remus said, leaning forward, "And if even a fraction of it is true, she is in danger as well as being a danger to a lot of people."

Dumbledore handed the letter back, "Well, I must say this is more excitement than my typical Tuesday afternoon. What did you mean when you said, 'almost unbelievable'?" He questioned, resuming his former penetrating gaze upon me.

Remus fidgeted agitatedly, "She knows things she should not. She had information only a few know. Most of whom are dead. She claims not to be a seer, but," here he paused, looking frustrated, "I'm not sure how else to say it. She claims that she is from the future or another dimension and that she read everything in a book. That she knows you and I, and intimate details of our lives and our future, from that. That she wasn't a witch before she got here." He pulled out my wand and held it up with a frown, "She voluntarily gave up her wand, without my asking."

"That is a most novel explanation, if you'll forgive the pun." Dumbledore said, his face mostly neutral, but with a hint of bemusement, "And an unusual action, to say the least."

I hadn't realized how significant handing over my wand would be. A part of me ached to have it back, even as Remus tucked it away again, but I would survive. I was well used to a life without doing magic.

"I do know some things." I said, "Specifically where certain things that were lost are. Things that could help prove my story. One is here in the castle...well, possibly two."

I frowned, thinking of Pettigrew. School had started by now. Was Percy a student here yet? Yeah he was several years older than Harry. I felt a shock like cold water settle in my stomach and I glanced at Remus. Was he also thinking of Peter?

Remus' hands clenched in his lap as I said this, and Dumbledore looked quite intrigued.

"I don't suppose, as a teacher, you could let a criminal remain among the students in your care, if you knew about him?" I asked. Remus went white as I said this, and looked at me in alarm, his mouth falling open. "He's here?"

"I think so." I replied and then looked at Dumbledore, who nodded, "It would not be morally ethical or responsible as an educator to do so, no. Provided, you tell me who this criminal is, though I have my suspicions, how he is hiding, and where."

"You'll hear me out, and believe me if I tell you and I'm proved right? Only," I paused, "You can't let the aurors know of my involvement." I glanced back at Remus, "Or his, I suppose."

"She's referring to Peter Pettigrew." Remus gritted out, through clenched teeth. His hands were clenched into fists and he kept releasing them spasmodically. I imagine he was visualizing himself strangling his former friend.

"Peter Pettigrew is dead." Dumbledore said with a frown.

"He is not dead, and Sirius Black never received a trial. A serious miscarriage of justice." I retorted.

Dumbledore looked like more weight had just landed on his shoulders, "If this is true, it would mean a lot of upset in the Ministry. These are quite serious accusations"

"And possible trouble with Harry Potter." I put in, narrowing my eyes. Dumbledore's eyes became sharp again and he leaned back, "I can see what you mean Remus. You do seem to know quite a lot, Miss Hughes."

"If she's correct in this, then there will be a great deal of change headed our way. Though, she has informed me we might avoid quite a lot of strife with her knowledge." Remus put in, rising to his feet and starting to pace.

"I don't wish to be at odds with you Albus, but I'd like to know why this wasn't looked into more carefully. Why you didn't look into it more carefully." Remus said, anger and hurt in his voice.

Dumbledore gave me another assessing look. He definitely knew I was playing them off on one another. I felt guilty about it, though I knew it was necessary.

"At the time, I did not suspect otherwise. I knew Sirius to be the Secret Keeper. He had to have been the reason." Here he paused, "If Pettigrew is indeed alive, then I must not have known what I thought I did."

Only a little tension bled out of Remus' shoulders at the explanation; though not an apology, I noted. He continued to pace.

"And where might we find him?" Dumbledore asked.

"He's relatively safe for now." I replied, "Though definitely something to be planned in advance. Going after him I mean."

"You keep your cards close to your chest, Miss Hughes, but I suppose I cannot hold that against you if you have been through everything you claim." He definitely was wary of me. Which was fine. I knew I would gain his trust, because Pettigrew was very close. I wasn't so sure about revealing the horcrux yet, thought that was also quite close. It wasn't going anywhere anyway. It had been sitting where it was for decades now.

"If you can indeed back up your claims, I will hear you out and provide what help I can." Dumbledore acceded. Remus stopped pacing to stare at me, as if he could force the information out of me with his gaze alone.

"If I'm right, Pettigrew is hiding out as a rat. He's an illegal animagus, and he sought to hide with a wizarding family. He should be currently hiding out as a pet with a boy in Gryffindor. Percy Weasley." I finally revealed. I had only held out for his assurance. I wanted the man caught too. Sirius did not deserve to rot in Azkaban and Harry deserved someone better than his Aunt and Uncle looking out for him.

Remus sneered in disgust and Dumbledore's eyes flicked to him and back to me. I was also concerned Remus might let his anger get the best of him and just go after Pettigrew. But it really was best that neither of us be directly involved. I hoped Dumbledore would see the sense in that.

"I see. Mr. Weasley is indeed a student here. A bright boy, and I do believe he has a pet rat he often brings down to breakfast." Dumbledore said thoughtfully.

"I can confirm Peter was an animagus, who took the form of a rat." Remus added.

Dumbledore remained silent for a moment, "All that was found was a finger. I suppose the rat would also be missing a digit? I think...yes."

"I will arrange to speak get Mr. Weasley and his pet in my office tomorrow morning, where, if you are correct, I will be able to reveal his true nature and detain him safely." he said, sounding tired.

"Might be wise to arrange for a visit or friendly chat with someone from the DMLE in that coincidentally overlaps with your time with Mr. Weasley." I suggested.

Remus snorted. "You sure you are supposed to be a Gryffindor?" he asked.

I blushed as Dumbledore quirked an eyebrow at me. "I-I mean. I was always sorted that way by quizzes and the online website for the fans…" I trailed off.

"Website?" Dumbledore enquired, and Remus also looked interested.

"A computer thing." I offered. Remus nodded and Dumbledore looked more interested.

"Muggles do make marvelous inventions. However, in this case, I have the real object within my possession." Dumbledore waved a hand at a shelf, and indeed, there sat a battered pointed hat.

I had been trying to ignore the rest of the office, but now that my attention had been diverted from our conversation, I took it all in. Rows of portraits of old headmasters lined the walls, most not-so-subtly eavesdropping on us.

"So cool." I said under my breath, taking it all in. The cabinet in the corner, the tables full of interesting gadgets, bookshelves, and a bird's perch, which was currently empty. "I'm really here…"

Then I blushed as I realized I had said that out loud. "The books are incredibly well-known," I defended in the face of a small smile from Dumbledore and a look of bemusement on Remus' face. "People dress up as their favorite characters, um...well, people I guess. And they recreate wizarding foods, and there are games where you can pretend to come here…" Remus was suppressing a chuckle now and Dumbledore's eyes twinkled merrily.

"Be that as it may. If you would indulge an old man and his curiosity, would you try on the sorting hat?" Dumbledore asked, rising and crossing to lift it from the shelf.

A tear opened near the top, and I think my own mouth fell open as the hat began to _talk_. "Most unusual Albus, but it's not like I have much else to do. Too early to start working on my song for next year." The hat grumbled. It's voice was not at all like the one in the movies. More soft. Like fabric rubbing against itself.

It's not that I didn't know the hat would talk. But it's something else to know and to actually see it in real life. I had to give myself a mental shake. He had asked me something important.

I was sure he had his reasons for offering me this, but how could I refuse? I was very curious, and although I could never be a student here, I wanted to know. Who wouldn't?

"Alright." I acquiesced, sensing this was also a kind of test. My answer seemed to please Dumbledore and I let him settle the hat on my head. Immediately I felt a presence in my mind.

_I can see why you were "sorted" that way before, though of course no online quiz could compare to me._ The voice came in my mind. _I don't usually sort adults. Pity. Your personalities are much more set later in life. And you specifically seem to know a little of how I work._ I was trying hard not to give my opinion one way or the other. _Yes. Hm._

_Does that make it more difficult to sort me?_ I thought.

_In some ways yes, in some ways it is easier._

More silence.

_You would have done well in Slytherin or Ravenclaw as well, but your heart truly belongs to_ _**Gryffindor** _ _._

The last word was spoken aloud as well as in my mind, and I took a last second to think clearly at the hat, _Thank you._

I could feel the heat of a blush on my face as I lifted the hat off and gave it back to Dumbledore. Both of them were looking at me with that weighing look again.

It shouldn't matter. It really shouldn't. But somehow it did. I could see that. I could see how I had been let into a secret club, in a way. The tiny smidgen of trust I'd just gained.

"I would have done well in Slytherin or Ravenclaw too." I nodded at the hat.

Remus nodded to himself, as if confirming a suspicion, and Dumbledore smiled again. "It's always nice to be certain when there is any uncertainty when something is in question." he said. I had a feeling he was referring to more than just the house I belonged to, but I wasn't sure what.

"Not that that wasn't an interesting diversion," Remus said, "But there is more. So much more." He looked at me again, and I took up the thread, starting at the beginning, "When I came here, I didn't know where I was at first, except back in time. It was quite a shock. I just appeared in the middle of a sidewalk in London. I'm from New Jersey in the US." I explained

"I quickly discovered the date and that my mother doesn't exist here. I tried calling my grandmother, and though she is alive, she doesn't have a daughter, which she should at this time."

I paused to swallow the tightness in my throat against the sorrow that those thoughts brought. "I am an artist. I found work, and I pulled myself up, despite my inadvertent time travel. But I started seeing things, that now I know were magical, and things started happening around me, that were magical. It brought aurors to my doorstep...which caused the whole thing to spill out, and now I'm out of a job and I have to find someplace new to live, and I've got to learn how to use my magic..."

I wiped a few more tears away. "Once I realized where I was, I had to decide what to do, and it's partially because I need assistance that I'm even telling you at all. Though I couldn't stand by and let bad things happen, if they were preventable."

"A commendable impulse." Dumbledore said.

"I suppose. Though why me, of all people…" I paused again, and then sighed. "I already told a lot of it to Remus. But the gist is that Voldemort will return. I know the prophecy that involves Harry Potter. There will be another war."

Dumbledore had the look of someone fitting a bunch of puzzle pieces together and making sense of the picture it presented.

"I see. I had suspected as much. Please, continue." He waved a hand.

Remus frowned and stopped pacing, but hovered near the corner of the desk.

"I know I still haven't proven that I'm telling the truth, but I know of several things right here. That could be proven very quickly. I know where Ravenclaw's diadem is and I can also tell you where the Chamber of Secrets is." I blurted out, struck with the thought. Another way to prove I was telling the truth. Remus gaped at me. I hadn't mentioned the chamber to him earlier. Or the diadem. Even now I'd left out that it was a horcrux.

"The future must have been grave indeed." Dumbledore said after a moment.

"I don't suppose you know what Slytherin's monster is, and whether it still lives?"

"It is still alive. It's a basilisk, but none of us could access the chamber anyway. Unless you can speak Parseltongue?" I asked rhetorically.

Bemusement again. "No, I do not possess that talent."

"Well anyway, the entrance is through one of the sinks in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. There's a snake etched into one of the faucets, I think." I frowned. "It's hard to remember all the details, and the movies were different from the books."

"It should be easy enough to confirm whether that bathroom has the feature you speak of." Dumbledore said.

"I know where the stone is too. From my letter." I said. Remus wouldn't understand, but the headmaster would. I saw something almost like, well not greed exactly, but need, crossed with guilt and sadness flash through his eyes.

I stayed quiet. I felt a bit of panic because of blurting so much out. I needed them to trust me. But I didn't know how much information was too much. I didn't think hunting horcruxes without proper preparation was wise. But then, who knew? I needed trust first.

"I assume you knew that bit of information would intrigue me." He prodded.

"I know why." I answered. I could see it there in his eyes. He was already taking me seriously, but now I'd made it personal. He couldn't force me to tell him without compromising his morals. But I would tell him. I tried to convey that with my own eyes. I'd tell him if he only offered me the sanctuary and help I was very much in need of.

Something like frustration tinged his expression now, as he glanced at a clock on the wall. "Well, though this has been fascinating, and there is still much we have not spoken of, and I'm afraid I didn't set aside enough time in my day to devote to you and all the information you've brought." Dumbledore said, somewhat regretfully, "Though we have much more to talk about, I think it's best to wait until after I have personally confirmed a few details."

I blinked. Oh. I guess I shouldn't have expected him to have hours to spend with me.

"Though you'll have to forgive me, if I ask Remus if he's willing to further keep an eye on you in the meantime" Here Remus nodded and Dumbledore ran a hand through his beard. "Thank you my boy. I'm inclined to believe you Miss Hughes, if only because you strike me as an honest person, but we must be cautious."

"I don't suppose you'd be willing to let me give you a memory." I asked, slowly. "A skilled legilimens should be able to tell whether it is a true one or not."

Dumbledore and Remus exchanged another look. I resisted the urge to sigh. I needed them to trust me, but there was no urgency, not really. Still, it was frustrating when they kept doubting me. Not that I didn't understand. I'm sure I wouldn't have believed me either.

"I will of course accept a memory, should you wish to provide one. However, memories can be misleading. What is real in your head may not be real to the rest of us. I hope you understand." He said gently.

What a nice way of saying I might be crazy. I had to hand it to him. Not much got past the Headmaster.

"I understand." I said. Then I held up my wrists together towards Remus, "Take me away."

He frowned at me, obviously not amused by my bad joke.

"If I may, Albus. Is there any time for us to have a word, in private?"

I tried not to look hurt at that. I had gotten the impression that both of them somewhat believed me. But maybe somewhat was still not enough.

"Do you mind waiting here a moment? Please have some more tea, or a lemon drop. They really are delicious." Dumbledore said, rising to his feet and leading Remus away.

"I don't mind." I replied, and reached for my cup again. Despite having put it down for awhile, it was still the perfect temperature. Magic was amazing.

A soft click announced their departure.

I looked up at the portraits. I really was curious as to how they worked. How they were made. They were very realistic, but not quite photo realistic. I could see the influences of different artists. They must be painted by hand.

I was interested in them for more than aesthetic reasons of course. I'd also need a wizarding job. I wasn't sure if wizards did art the same way, and of course I could turn my hand to any number of things if needed. I wasn't picky or elitist. But painting was my true love, and I didn't think it would translate that much differently.

The portraits were quirky and different. Mostly old men of course, but there were a few women tucked in he pictures. One of them winked saucily at me, but none spoke.

"Can you talk to me?" I asked one portrait of a funny looking man with big ears. He shrugged at me and shook his head.

So probably had been told not to. Probably would report my every move to Dumbledore too.

I didn't wonder much what they were talking about. I thought that was pretty obvious. Whether I was trustworthy or not. Whether I was crazy or not.

I'm glad I gave my wand to Remus. Not that I could really use it. But it seemed to have gone a long way with the both of them.

I was dying to look around. But I knew better than to poke at magical objects when I didn't know what they were.

I wish I had my cell phone. Or rather, that it worked right now. I had been a tech junkie. I still was, but there was hardly anything like I was used to there being. No internet wherever I went. No cat collecting apps to play on while waiting for someone.

What had I done as a kid in moments like these? Mostly read books I think. Or made up stories in my head. Drawn or doodled.

My eyes were drawn to the candy bowl on his desk. It looked exactly like the crystal bowl full of candies my great grandmother used to put all over her living room. With a start, I realized my great grandmother would only be a bit younger than Dumbledore himself.

He had said to try them. I wasn't sure if his lemon drops were laced with poison or calming draught as the popular fandom had it. I kind of doubted that. Still. He had pushed the candy kind of hard at us.

I shrugged and snagged one, unwrapping the cellophane and popping it into my mouth. If I hadn't died from interdimensional time travel displacement, then this probably wouldn't kill me either.

Oh my god.

All those people who had turned them down in the books. They were crazy. These were delicious. I kinda got why Dumbledore had an obsession with them.

They seemed like ordinary muggle candy. Nothing strange happened when I ate one. But they were possibly the most lemony delicious thing I'd ever had.

I pocketed a handful. Why the heck not.

I savored it as the candy melted in my mouth slowly. I was so asking where he got these from. I hadn't seen any in the shops in London like this.

I got a mental image of me approaching Dumbledore like a crack addict looking for my next fix and I giggled.

Then my north faded as the reality of the situation came crashing down on me again. I leaned back and closed my eyes with a sigh. The mood swings were really getting to me.

I was a normally pretty optimistic person. But it's really hard to be optimistic when I had all this anxiety and fear for my future. The uncertainty was killing me.

I liked things planned out. I always had a plan. I wasn't a fly by the seat of my pants person, although I could be flexible when needed.

I just wanted to not be stuck in crazy land. I wanted normal. But even the muggle world wasn't normal to me. Nothing felt right.

All alone, the doubt started creeping back in. Was I doing the right thing? I had probably changed everything. Over the course of one day.

This story would never play out as it had done in the books anymore. Excuse me, life, not story. Because this was my life. If I let myself think it was a story, and that these people were not really real, I knew I'd be losing my sanity.

I dug my hands into the squishy chair. Crazy as my life was, I had a little control now. It was going to be alright, most likely. I wasn't the sole person responsible anymore. I had given some of my burden to Dumbledore and Remus. Maybe it wasn't fair, but I was glad I wasn't facing this alone.

They _would_ come to my side. Or at least, come to understand I was telling the truth. I don't know if Dumbledore and I would see eye to eye on everything. Though I think Remus was someone I could be friends with.

I wanted him to be my friend. Already kind of felt like he was one. Such a pain. Knowing stuff about people before you meet them.

My thoughts were interrupted by the return of Remus and Dumbledore. I got to my feet and crossed to stand in front of the fire.

"I'll be seeing you again very soon Miss Hughes." Dumbledore said. And if he wasn't too warm towards me, he wasn't really cold either.

"Goodbye Professor," I said, "Thank you for seeing me. I will tell you everything you want to know. In time you'll see I'm not crazy."

His eyes twinkled. "I don't think you're crazy Miss Hughes. I just think it best to check on some of the information you've given first."

"Fair enough." I said, and Remus stepped up beside me to lead me back to the floo. Dumbledore bid his final farewell and left the office.

"Where to?" I asked, ignoring the odd look Remus was giving me.

"It might be best for you to stay at my home. For now. Though we can certainly go retrieve some of your things." He said. He looked like he expected me to protest, but I'd already suspected this might be the case. At any rate, I couldn't stay forever in my muggle apartment and I wasn't alarmed by Remus being a werewolf.

"Alright," I replied, "I don't live far from Diagon Alley actually."

"Ladies first." Remus offered me the floo powder.

I tossed it into the flames, stated my destination, and the world flashed by in green fire once more.


	7. Revealing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Finally had a bit more time to get back to this. I got back from a several thousand mile road trip recently. Got to see a bunch of amazing places and spend some time with family. It relaxed and inspired me.
> 
> I never do this, but if you enjoy my content, please consider donating a coffee on ko-fi! ko-fi.com/dollfinchick
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoy this :)
> 
> Disclaimer: Of course I don't own any of this. I write solely for my own enjoyment and the reading pleasure of others.

 

* * *

We left the Leaky Cauldron without anymore discussion. I was still trying to calm my spinning head and contain my nausea, and Remus was lost deep in thought.

"It's not far." I said, after we had stepped out into Muggle London. I led the way through the streets. I eyed my companion as he kept his eyes on me. I inwardly sighed and tried not to make any sudden movements or act suspicious.

On sight of my apartment building he seemed to relax slightly. I let us in the building and up the stairs to my door. My hand shook a bit as I slotted the key into the lock.

I felt more nervous now than I did this morning. "I didn't expect to show anyone my home today. Forgive me for any mess." I said. Remus shrugged. "I'll have to ask the same of you, unfortunately. My home isn't exactly in a state fit for visitors, and I don't get many at any rate."

He trailed off with a slightly self-deprecating smile. I simply looked away and opened the door, flicking on the light and entering the room.

An offended screech and the flapping of wings startled me into dropping my keys. Beside me Remus drew his wand but I hastily threw out an arm. "It's okay! "It's okay. Both of you!" I said, as Gandalf landed heavily on my shoulder and started pecking at my head. I winced when he nipped my ear in reprimand. Then he abruptly flew to his stand, nearly knocking me over.

"That is a massive Owl."

I looked up to find Remus staring at Gandalf, frozen between the door and the kitchen. Gandalf had puffed up his feathers and was giving Remus the once over with a baleful gaze. At least Remus had lowered his wand, though he still gripped it in one hand.

"I'm so sorry. I literally just got him and he's temperamental." I said apologetically, crossing the room to pet my owl's feathers soothingly.

Remus looked over at me and then also walked over and cautiously offered a hand to Gandalf, "He's very unusual. I would've thought you'd pick something to blend in, not stand out."

I snorted, "Gandalf chose me, not the other way around. He's a handsome devil and he knows it, so he's got an attitude problem." Gandalf preened at my words and let Remus scratch his head.

Remus chuckled, "Gandalf? As in Gandalf the Grey?" He asked.

"Got it in one." I replied. My lips quirked, "I am vetting people for friendship based on whether or not they get the reference." I said as deadpan as I could manage.

This made Remus laugh even louder. A startled sort of laughter. Today had held too much stress for the both of us, and I could hear the edge to it.

"You pass." I informed him while scratching Gandalf fondly. I liked my owl. He was a bit of a jerk but he was mine. He was eyeing Remus with some suspicion as the man kept laughing, but he was also getting scratched by two people, so like the hedonist he was, he let it go in favor of the attention he was getting.

"It's good to meet you Gandalf." Remus addressed my owl with a quirk of his lips. "I suppose I'll be having two house guests. I don't see this fellow letting you go off on your own."

Sheepishly I ducked my head, "I'm sorry, I didn't even think of that. But you're probably right. We're still getting to know one another but he does seem to like to stick pretty close."

"It's no problem. He'll probably like stretching his wings at my home. More trees and plenty of things to hunt." Remus said. I met his kind eyes and I couldn't help but relax a bit.

"Thanks. I'm going to go grab a bag now and get some things together. Shouldn't take long." I told him. I didn't take much. Just some clothes and hygiene stuff. I didn't have much left in my fridge so I didn't worry about food going bad. I did grab the few books I'd purchased. May as well get started on them.

I came back to my kitchen to find Gandalf had relocated to Remus' shoulder and was rearranging the sandy strands to his satisfaction. Remus looked unperturbed by this, leaning nonchalantly against my counter with his hands tucked in the pockets of his trousers.

"So how are we doing this?" I asked, adjusting my backpack on my shoulder. Remus looked up and then, "Apparition," he replied and took Gandalf to the window. My owl looked back at me and I nodded. "Go on. You're smart and you'll be able to find us."

Gandalf seemed disgruntled but he took to wing and was quickly gone from sight. Remus closed the window shut behind him.

I started to look for his cage and food but Remus cleared his throat, "I took the liberty of gathering and shrinking his things."

"Oh. Thanks." I said. I stared awkwardly at him for a moment. He cleared his throat again and held out an arm "Shall we?"

I threaded my arm through his, stepping close enough to his lanky body I could feel the warmth he put off. Then he spun on his heel and we were gone.

I kept my eyes closed this time, but the movement still made my head spin. I clutched his arm with my other hand and took deep breaths.

He let me cling for a moment until I abruptly released him. He had a thoughtful look on his face again. I turned to look at our surroundings.

We had appeared on a little dirt road that wound past bushes and plants and just up ahead I could see a little cottage nestled between the trees.

Remus was already walking so I followed him to a little wooden gate and around to the side of the house where he let me in to a little mud room.

It was clear to me that this cottage had seen better days. The door was scratched and the windows looked like they'd protest anyone trying to open them. There were weeds growing in the garden and the mud room was, well, muddy.

There were cobwebs in the corners and I saw rather large dust bunny on the floor when I removed my shoes and slid them under a wooden bench.

Remus was a bit pink in the face as he cleared his throat and led the way into the house. The mud room opened on a kitchen which was also cluttered and had dirty dishes in the sink.

Strangely, the mess made me relax. It was homey. My own family had been hopeless wrecks when it came to cleaning. But this wasn't a house of a hoarder. Instead it looked comfortably lived in. Like a worn out sweater with holes that you can't bear to throw away.

"Just this way…" he muttered and I followed. We passed through a cozy living room stuffed with books and an unused dining room also with books piled on every spare surface. Even the china cupboard had books stacked in front of the glass doors and I had to repress a laugh.

A set of stairs creaked as we walked up them.

The carpet tread was worn thin beneath my feet, but mostly clean. Upstairs was a simple hallway with several closed door leading off of it.

"This is the toilet and bath." He tapped one door, and then gestured at the end of the hall "That's me. But you'll be in here."

He opened the door across from the bathroom and walked in. A faint bit of pink dusted his cheeks as he pulled out his wand and cast a few  _Scourgify'_ s around. The layer of dust that had lain across the furniture seemed reluctant to go, but it vanished with repetition.

I watched in wonder at this display of magic, stepping in the room and looking around. I was an expert cleaner and do-it-yourself craftswoman. But magic made the work pass in moments, when I knew it would have taken me well over an hour by hand. Longer if you counted laundry. That alone impressed upon me the power that supposedly was now at my fingertips.

It was small. Barely big enough to hold the bed. A chest lay at the foot and a dresser next to the door. It had a window with a set of flowery curtains and a closet that Remus was opening and digging through.

A sudden curse from Remus had me turning to see what the trouble was. Several small purple and brown creatures with moth like wings hurtled out of the closet and dive bombed Remus.

"Argh!" He cried, and I ducked as one got smacked towards me from his flailing limbs. Another moment and he was casting a charm I was too busy to listen to as the two more of the things came after me.

"Ouch!" I cried, and smacked one out of the air as the other one tugged on my hair and tried to scratch my eyes.

"Hold still!" Remus cried, and promptly froze the creatures. One remained tangled in my hair and I tried to tug it out in disgust.

"Oh my god what the fuck?!" I said, pulling futilely on my hair in distress.

"I'm so sorry! Just let me-" Remus approached apologetically and carefully reached over and started untangling the mess. His hands were deft and warm but very gentle as he pulled strands aside and removed the creepy thing from my hair.

I stood there awkwardly, wincing as every now and then, despite the gentleness, a piece of hair got tugged too hard. "Woah it really got stuck in there," Remus muttered. His hand brushed my ear accidentally and I shivered.

It took another moment, but then my hair was free. He stepped back from me, clearing his throat. He look a bit abashed and soon was turning to scoop the rest of the tiny things off the floor and out of the air.

"They didn't bite you, did they?" Remus asked worriedly, standing to his feet with an armful of them. I shook my head.

"No." I took a step closer and shuddered seeing them. They almost look like a fairy, crossed with a frog and a moth. Fuzzy, but with sharp teeth and a strange shaped head. I felt the sudden need to scrub my hair with bleach.

"What the hell are these things?" I asked, poking one's wing. It was powdery, just like a moth. Ugh. Gross.

"Ah. Doxies. I knew I had an infestation in the attic but I hadn't realized they'd gotten in here as well. I'm going to have to pick up Doxycide." Remus replied, "If you'll give me a minute….should be some clean sheets in the closet and blankets and pillows in the chest…" he trailed off, ducking out of the room with the doxies.

I brushed my hand off on my pants and cautiously approached the closet. Nothing more came flying out so I reached for a neatly folded sheet set and started making the bed. The chest held a comforter and some heavier blankets as well as a few pillows.

The chest of drawers was empty and nothing was on top so I set my backpack on it and poked my head out of the door.

I could hear rummaging below and I wondered what time it was now. Late afternoon probably.

I went and grabbed a set of towels I'd seen in the closet, dug out my shampoo, and went to the bathroom across the hall. My skin itched a bit where I'd poked the doxy and where it had gotten stuck in my hair. Probably wouldn't hurt to wash off.

It didn't look like it had been used much recently either. Though there was no dust laying about. I cautiously checked behind the shower curtain but no more strange creatures lurked there. I checked the cupboard under the sink and the medicine cabinet as well, but the only items I found were toilet paper, some spare bottles of shampoo, an extra bar of soap, and a very old bottle of some hair potion that half the label had worn off of.

I locked the door and turned on the water.

* * *

I hadn't taken long in the shower and I was now uncertain of what to do. I wasn't exactly a guest, and I wasn't exactly a prisoner.

It hadn't escaped my notice that Remus had left me uninformed as to our whereabouts.

I pulled my hair back from my face and scraped it into a ponytail, still wet. I didn't have any wish to hide in the room I'd been given. Actually, I had the urge to tidy up the house, but I knew it might be taken badly if I did.

I just felt bad for crashing on him. And I really didn't mind the untidiness. I just liked to be useful and have my hands occupied when I was nervous.

The curtains in my room were still a bit dusty. I spotted a shed around the back of the house and Remus ducking in and out of it.

I decided against joining him. I felt like I'd almost be some sort of puppy trailing him about...instead I snagged my textbook and went back down the stairs into the living room.

There was a sagging couch and two armchairs in front of a fireplace. I chose the couch and curled up on it to read.

I heard Remus come in sometime later, and more sensed than saw him poking his head in to check on me.

He joined me after a time, sinking down into one of the armchairs with a book. He didn't turn the pages of it, though it lay open before him. I could feel his staring like a weight on my neck. It prickled.

I finally gave in and sighed aloud in irritation.

"This only has to be as awkward as we make it you know." I said with a frown, and closed the book.

"I'm sorry to have crashed on you," I said, because I did feel a bit guilty, "But do you have to stare? I'm not going to bite. I promise."

For some reason he winced and went a bit pale at my words. And I blushed in mortification. There were multiple interpretations of biting when you were discussing things with a werewolf. I'd forgotten.

"Sorry." I muttered. What else could I say?

He didn't say anything for another moment, but at least he removed his gaze from me. "I just can't seem to decide whether to believe you. There's too much going through my mind. Too many things that are happening and I can't do anything." He said in clear frustration, clenching and unclenching his hands, "But then you seem so…"

What I seemed like wasn't elaborated on however, as he turned away. But I could hazard a few guesses. "I suppose we'll find out soon enough. But it's so…" words failed him again.

"Wild? Crazy? Inconceivable?" I offered. A smile cracked his lips.

"Exactly." He agreed.

I shrugged, "I don't meant to be blasé. But I did the whole unbelievable thing when I found myself here. I've kind of been riding on the assumption that I am not crazy. I'm not sure I could have made it, otherwise."

He hummed noncommittally at me. His brow was furrowed and for the first time I realized he was just as nervous and out of sorts as I was. And why shouldn't he be? I had just overturned his life and told him one of his best friends was alive and a traitor, and the other was actually innocent and locked unjustly in Azkaban.

A lot was going to happen in the next 24 hours or less. And he was stuck here babysitting me. A potentially crazy lady.

"So, what's for dinner?" I asked, taking a stab at changing the subject and trying to get away from my own morose thoughts.

"Ah well," Remus blinked, "You know, I don't really know myself. I'll have to take a look."

"I can help cook. Least I can do." I offered. Remus promptly shook his head, "No. It's best if I do it."

I opened my mouth to protest but then shut it again on another rising sigh.

I guess I wouldn't want someone I suspected might be a spy or crazy to be cooking my food, so I let it go.

He left then and I was left alone feeling out of place and out of sorts.

* * *

Poor Percy Weasley didn't know it, but he was going to have a really bad day.

This year at Hogwarts was off to a decent start but he had so much work to do to maintain his good grades. He was bright, if not particularly loved for his personality by his professors. Everyone could agree he was a good student. He never caused trouble like his elder brothers had. Percy was a rule follower and had a strict sense of respect for any authority.

As such he had never had much cause to be hauled in front of any Professor. So when Professor Dumbledore asked him to abandon his breakfast and come up to his office, he felt a stab of alarm. Had something happened to his family? His accidentally splashed his pumpkin juice on Scabbers, though the lazy rat didn't seem to even notice.

Concern filled him when Dumbledore also turned to his brother and requested his presence.

Percy followed his brother and the headmaster through the castle, clutching his pet rat to comfort himself. Scabbers didn't seem to take it well and started squirming in his hands. He let Charlie ask the questions, but Dumbledore refused to answer one way or the other whether their family was alright or not.

Percy wished Bill were there. Instead he focussed on trying to calm his rat.

Though it was fascinating to see the Headmaster's office and the gargoyle statue that guarded it. But his stomach continued to drop as the Headmaster closed the door and he could see an auror waiting in the room, and not just any auror.

"Running late Albus?" The man asked gruffly, his voice like gravel. His face was rough and missing part of his nose and his ear. One of his legs was missing and ended in a clawed wooden foot. A startling electric blue eye swiveled madly in its' socket.

Percy gaped at the man who could only be the infamous Mad-Eye Moody.

"What is this about really Professor?" Charlie asked, putting a comforting hand on Percy's shoulder. Scabbers began wriggling in earnest and let out a terrified sounding squeak.

The Professor waved, "Ah do forgive me. Age catches up with me more and more and things like appointment times slip my mind occasionally."

Moody looked exasperated, but his attention was quickly drawn to Percy. "What's wrong with your rat boy?"

"I-I don't know." Percy stammered, trying to hold on to Scabbers. Apparently his rat had had enough because he suddenly bit Percy's finger. The boy yelled and promptly dropped the rat, blood coursing down his hand.

"Woah!" Shouted Charlie, diving for Scabbers. He caught him deftly and handled him like a rogue bludger as the animal thrashed and tried to escape. "What on earth has gotten into him?" He asked, avoiding Scabbers' blunt but sharp teeth.

"I don't think he likes you, Alastor." Dumbledore observed, a hint of amusement in his voice.

Moody's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "Bring him here." He grunted, withdrawing his wand.

"Wh-what are you going to do?" Percy cried. Sure he was upset Scabbers had bit him, but he was afraid the crazy looking auror who was known for his mental instability might actually harm his beloved pet.

Mad-Eye huffed. "It won't hurt him. Now bring him here boy." he commanded.

Charlie ignored Percy's protests, and looked up at Dumbledore, who nodded in encouragement. He held out the rat for the auror's inspection.

" _Immobulus_." Moody intoned, pointing his wand at the rat. Scabbers promptly froze.

"Hm." Moody squinted at Scabbers, his blue eye whirling. He gestured for Charlie to lay him on the desk.

"What do you see Alastor?" Dumbledore asked.

"Something not quite right. Wouldn't have noticed at all except for the ruckus." Moody replied. "Not a lot of reason to fear me. Except one." The man continued, gripping his wand and holding it to Scabbers' throat. " _Homorphus_!".

A bolt of blue light hit the animal and Percy gasped. He scrambled backwards as Scabbers began to expand before his very eyes. Charlie also backpedaled and shoved his brother behind him. Percy didn't protest, too riveted on the horrifying sight before him.

In Scabbers' place was a fat, disgusting, squat little man who writhed and gasped as snot and tears rolled down his cheeks. His clothes were tattered and he had watery eyes and a sniveling demeanor.

Moody's " _Incarcerous_!" drowned out another spell Dumbledore performed. Both striking the man without delay, who squeaked and squirmed as the ropes wrapped firmly around him.

"Noooo Noooooo Noooo…." The man moaned, wiggling in his bonds. He rolled off the desk and landed on the floor with a thump and a cry of pain.

"And people call me paranoid." Moody scoffed quietly, his eyes narrowed and his mouth set in a grim line. His wand remained pointed at the man.

"What is happening?! Who is that man?!" Charlie growled, his own wand in his hand.

Dumbledore stepped forward with a frown, his wand still trained on the man on the floor. "I do believe Mr. Weasley, that your pet was not in fact an animal, but an Animagus. Unless I'm much mistaken, this is Peter Pettigrew. Long thought to be dead."

"Noooo. Nooooo. You don't understand! He'll kill me! Noooooo!" Pettigrew sobbed and whined on the floor.

Dumbledore waved his wand and suddenly the man's moans and protestations were silent, those his mouth still opened and closed piteously.

Moody kicked the man in the side and Percy winced. He wanted to throw up. Had that man...been...this entire time? Oh Merlin…

He nearly did throw up when Moody bowed down and revealed a dirty arm marred with a faded, but still terrifying mark. A skull and a snake.

"I'm sure the boys back at the Ministry would like a word with you." Moody growled, none too gently dropping the arm with disgust.

"I think it's best if you brought your brother to Madame Pomfrey, Mr. Weasley." Dumbledore said, looking weary. "I will be informing your parents and will bring them to you. You're both excused from classes for the day. I'm sure the Aurors will need to question you as well, but that can wait until your hand is seen to."

"But-" Percy protested.

"Not now." Charlie said, sounding queasy himself. "Later Perce. Let's get that...bite...looked at." He scowled and looked like he'd be happy to hex the man on the floor for hurting his brother, but instead he began to drag him away and back down the stairs.

Percy didn't struggle, though he remained riveted as Moody casually kicked the wriggling lump again. "Now Alastor…." he heard Dumbledore protest, just before the door closed.

"Oh oh oh." Percy said when they reached the other side of the gargoyle. Tears starting to pour down his face. "Charlie, I-I."

"It's okay." Charlie said, roughly turning hugging his brother. Though his voice shook, he let Percy cling to him in a way both boys would find embarrassing at any other moment.

"Mum is going to have kittens." Charlie said hoarsely after Percy got himself a little better under control.

"Oh no." Moaned Percy in horror.

He had forgotten about his mother.


	8. Barking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Sorry for the delay. My life went to hell in a handbasket recently. My family had a fire in our home and it’s made life difficult. Let’s hope that the rest of the year is looking up. *knocks on wood* But on the bright side, we finally we get to visit Sirius’ point of view! Woohoo!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I write this solely for the entertainment value it brings.

Sirius Black's life had turned upside down a long time ago.

He had been locked up for years. He knew he was innocent. He knew. It was sometimes the only thing that kept him from losing his mind. He clung to that fact when he couldn't even manage to open his eyes from the despair pressing in from all sides.

He had been fairly good at wandless magic, but under these conditions he couldn't manage more than some feeble charms. Sometimes. He'd mostly given up on doing any magic since it always brought the dementors down upon his head.

He wasn't the only soul left to rot here though.

He heard them whispering sometimes. When they had the strength to whisper. They wondered if they'd been betrayed by him. By that rat. Because his information led to the direct downfall of their Lord.

The actual Death Eaters knew Sirius was innocent. They had laughed when the aurors had brought him here.

That man...must have gone into hiding to save his own skin. The Light would kill him for the betrayal of Lily and James and the Dark would see him dead for his role in Voldemort's defeat.

It just confirmed what Sirius already knew.

Sometimes he just wanted to be free. Most of the time he absolutely knew he deserved to be there. The guilt corroded his soul like acid. It whispered in the corners of his mind and undermined his sanity.

Other times he was sure he had to commit the crime he'd been accused of. It was what the rat deserved. The anger sat in his stomach like an unmoving red hot stone.

When he shifted, it didn't hurt so much. Not the physical or the mental aches. Things were more distant to him. Like a layer of gauze had been wrapped around his emotions. It was sweet relief. Dogs weren't beholden to higher functions of thought.

The dementors left him alone then. So he spent as much time as possible as Padfoot. Being human was too painful.

He wasn't sure how many years he'd been here. He wondered how little Harry was doing. He wondered how they ever could have suspected Remus.

Ah Remus. His one true friend left. He hoped he was getting on alright. Being a werewolf was a hardship even with good people by your side.

He even wondered on occasion how Snivellus had managed to weasel out of trouble. He could only assume he had, because he wasn't where Sirius was and the greasy git was too slippery to have died.

The injustice of it made his stomach burn. The stone glowing white hot.

He didn't have much else left to do but think. Azkaban was a dark, cold, slimy hell and even that description seemed too mild.

There was hardly any human interaction. The other prisoners had no interest in him. At least, not anymore.

His dear cousin had spat at him once as she'd passed by surrounded by guards, but the madness running in her veins had only been fed and grown into more of a monster as time passed. She was proud to be there. Proud to be loyal enough to the Dark Lord that she had been thrown into this hell on earth. She was proud to stay there until he returned and freed his faithful servants, as she was sure he would. She was one of the few who laughed more than screamed.

The others knew he wasn't one of them. They hated him. Always had. Sometimes he could see the humor in being locked up with them, considered one of them. They had taunted him in the beginning, when they could still remember why.

The dementors were happy to be the jailers and to torment their prisoners. Sometimes he wondered if they removed all of them from this old fortress if the stones would ever recover from the madness and grief they were steeped in. He didn't think so.

The conditions were horrid. As to be expected. The dementors didn't care about keeping them alive. This place was so inundated with bad emotions that they could live there quite happily without the prisoners for some time. And there were always new prisoners to replace those who died.

He was fed. Not much and nothing great. Padfoot didn't mind the food as much as Sirius did. Padfoot was happy to eat anything. Even rats and mice. The animal mind was more focussed on survival.

So he was just a tad healthier than the others here. But the constant damp and cold combined with the soul chilling from the dementors meant he was never truly warm. Never felt like he was full even when his stomach had shrunk. He had a blanket and a pillow, but no bed.

And mentally he was still a mess. It was hard to keep his thoughts straight. Hard to think in words at all sometime. He knew being Padfoot so much wasn't good for his psyche, but the dementors were far far worse.

His cell was always dark. He slept when he could and stayed awake when he couldn't.

He listened for news about the rat. He listened for news about Harry. The Ministry hardly paid any visits to the poor souls in this place, but they often brought newspapers and magazines when they did. New prisoners often brought news too.

Nothing they brought was all that interesting to him.

He figured he could probably escape. Padfoot was almost slim enough to squeeze through the bars and the dementors had no interest in him as a dog. A few missed meals and he'd be able to vanish.

But what was the point? James and Lily were gone. And the rat had to be hiding with a Wizarding family. He couldn't think of anywhere else he might be, but until he got word he had no direction. He was too fat and lazy to try and hide as a wild rat, and a pet rat would be well taken care of. Searching for him would be difficult without any idea where he might be.

Remus didn't know Sirius was innocent, but he knew Sirius was an animagus. He could easily tell the Ministry and they would catch him again. Though...he didn't think he'd been charged as an illegal animagus. That part was fuzzy. He wasn't sure he had even received a trial.

He didn't have much hope for being out long before he was caught again. Especially since he absolutely intended to finish what he'd gone out to do all those years ago.

So Sirius waited, sometimes as a man, sometimes as a dog. He waited and he plotted but he couldn't have predicted what happened next.

It always caused a commotion when someone actually came to the fortress. The dementors were forced to back off from the prisoners and the Ministry officials and aurors assigned to protect them made much more normal noises than anyone who was an inhabitant of Azkaban ever did.

Sirius had heard them come through same as anyone. He barely registered it though, other than to switch back into a man. He was exhausted and didn't feel much like engaging. He forced himself to listen instead and was mildly curious when the voices stopped outside his door.

"Prisoner 3-9-0. You are hereby released into Auror custody to face a trial due to new evidence which has recently been uncovered in regard to your case." A stuffy voice said.

The door flew open and he didn't resist as he was magically manacled and hauled to his feet by two aurors he didn't recognize.

"What?" He managed, mind still foggy and not quite comprehending what was happening. He stumbled as he was tugged forward.

"You're being brought in for a trial. You'll be placed in the Ministry holding cells until then." The officious man at the door continued, sneering in disgust as Sirius' rags brushed too closely to his own self for comfort as he was half dragged and half marched out of the cell and down the corridor.

* * *

The Ministry cells were much nicer than Azkaban. He had a cot, and the food they fed him was a hundred times better. They'd even sent a healer in to see him, and she'd been quick and professional, but not very forthcoming otherwise. His physical hurts had been tended, if not his mental ones.

He slept better than he could remember ever sleeping. He had even cried out of sheer relief from not having the dementors draining him day and night. The tears had stained his pillow. Crisp and white and fluffy.

He still didn't know what was going on. He felt almost like he'd been transported to a fantasy world. Or that he was dreaming.

He was woken from a doze by aurors who came to escort him to a private room where he was manacled to a chair and left without them saying another word. A desk stood before him and another chair lay on the other side.

His anxiety was just beginning to kick in when a solemn looking man entered holding a briefcase and sat himself down across from Sirius.

"Hello Mr. Black. I'm Andrew Darling and I'm to be your legal representation in your upcoming trial." He said, sitting down and withdrawing parchment, ink, and quill from the case.

By then, Sirius was more confused than ever. This had to be a dream surely? But the constant cold and soul ache of the dementors weren't there.

He realized he'd been quiet for quite some time and Darling was staring at him. He licked his dry lips.

"Trial?" He asked in a croaking voice.

Darling frowned, "Yes. And I think you've got good a shot at walking away with quite a bit, considering you never got a trial and because of current events. I think it's safe to say we can counter sue for all the damages your extended stay in Azkaban caused. Miscarriage of justice and all that. We can take them for all they've got. Why when I think-"

Sirius blinked and interrupted. "What events?"

This time it was Darling's turn to look confused, and then irritated. "You mean you don't know? Nobody informed you of what is happening?"

Sirius gestured helplessly, or at least as much as he was able to with his hands bound.

Darling pursed his lips, and then snapped his case open again. He withdrew a newspaper and slid it across the desk in front of Sirius.

"My dear man, they found Pettigrew."

And with those words, Sirius' life turned upside down once more. His breath caught in his throat as he read the headline.

 **SIRIUS** **BLACK** **INNOCENT?** **PETTIGREW** **FOUND** **ALIVE**.

* * *

Remus' hands shook slightly as he read the all capitalized words on the front page of the Daily Prophet.

Below the headline was an old picture of Sirius on the left, taken some time before he had been sent to Azkaban, and on the right a photo of Peter being hauled off and struggling by aurors. He looked at the two faces of the men he had once counted his closest friends and didn't know what to feel.

Relief that Sirius was innocent? Grief that he had been locked away in a horrible place unfairly? Anger that Peter had betrayed them. All of them. Sadness at the reminder of all they had lost. He felt all of that, and more.

He read further and blinked at the trial date, which was tomorrow. There was the usual speculation and misassumptions the Prophet was renowned for. Hardly better than a gossip rag. It covered the infamous events and speculated that maybe Sirius was innocent.

Merlin's saggy balls. She hadn't been lying.

He glanced up at the ceiling, where he knew she still lay sleeping. She had stayed up half the night reading in his living room. He had needed a Pepperup potion after staying up to watch her. Not that he could have slept anyway.

She had left the book on the couch, The Standard Book of Spells. He had thought maybe it had been for show...but apparently she really couldn't do any magic.

He rubbed his tired eyes. That was a problem...with all she knew...she couldn't afford, well they couldn't afford to leave her so defenseless. Not for very long.

He had promised to help, hadn't he? He had other things to worry about though. Finding another job for one. Sirius….well he wasn't sure what to do about Sirius. Would his friend want to see him? His own heart ached to see him again, though he was afraid of what kind of state he'd see Sirius in.

His heart had never healed all the way since the war. And some burdens he never thought he'd be able to put down...but Sirius...had always been special among his friends. Wild, reckless, and brilliant were a few adjectives that came to mind.

He groaned and put his head in his hands. He couldn't bear it if Sirius hated him. But he wouldn't blame him if he did.

So much chaos in his life. All because of one witch. Albeit, a very pretty witch. A very pretty witch who he was indebted to very deeply. And who very likely would cause more problems in the near future.

But Remus was an empathetic soul, and he couldn't bring himself to be angry at or resentful of her. His gut instinct was to like her. He felt sorry for her, to be torn from one's family and home and placed somewhere beyond your knowledge and understanding? That was quite a frightening thing. He couldn't even conceive of the emotional upheaval she must be going through.

She didn't seem much older or younger than himself actually, if he had her age pegged right. So she was still young.

And she had sat there on his couch and defied him. Even knowing exactly what he was. She wasn't afraid of him. But she did need help. Remus was a man of his word and he had more than one instinct urging him towards chivalry.

He pulled her wand out. He had gotten the sense it didn't dislike him exactly, but nor would it work properly for him. Wands were incredibly personal. For her to give it to him…

He wasn't sure what to do now, but he was sure Albus would be reaching out to him soon.

* * *

I woke suddenly, an unsettled feeling in the pit of my stomach. I threw the quilt on the bed back and put my feet on the floor. My head hurt too, really badly.

I leaned forward and kneaded my forehead and temples as the pain seemed to intensify. The back of my neck hurt, and I felt nauseous too.

I stumbled to my feet, dizzy, and barely managed to make it to the bathroom before I was throwing my guts up.

Blue green lights flashed before my eyes even as I shut them and the world had gone all wobbly and wavy.

I have had migraines before, but never one as bad as this. Not one that had come on so suddenly. But I hardly had room for fear and alarm as the pain and nausea roiled through me like a snake.

I threw up again, spitting acid into the bowl.

The pain seemed determined to come to a crescendo and I tried to breathe through it as the pressure and throbbing in my head built. It felt like my head was in a vise and someone was beating on it like a drum. My stomach was still in knots and I could not keep my head up. I collapsed pathetically on the floor with my arms around my head and tears started streaming down my face.

Curled up in the fetal position, I found that I could barely move for the pain. I tried to scream but only a choked noise escaped my throat.

Tears coursed down my face though my eyes remained shut against the light that seemed unbearably bright. I couldn't help it. It hurt so damn much. A choked sob left my mouth, but it made the pain worse. The sound of ragged breathing filled the room. My stomach felt like acid was burning a hole through my body.

Then suddenly there was a shattering and a popping noise. Something rained down on my bare arms and I felt a sudden liquid warmth. Something else crackled and for scent of smoke rose in the air

So suddenly it left me breathless, all of my pain stopped.

"What-are you alright?!" The alarmed question made me weakly open my eyes to meet Remus' but I had no answer for him. He didn't wait for one as he quickly whipped out his wand, " _Aguamenti_!" He shot a stream of water at the shower curtain which, I belatedly realized, was on fire.

There were fragments of porcelain and mirror all over. Blood ran down my arms and I had bits of glass stuck in my skin. I opened my mouth to say something, but found I still couldn't find the words.

But then Remus was there, kneeling in the mess and gently helping me sit up and get to my feet. His face was worried, and I felt a wave of guilt for wrecking his bathroom.

He supported me out of the room and to the bedroom where he gently pushed me to sit on the bed and left. I stared at the blood running down my arms.

I felt stunned. What was that? What the hell had happened? Why was my head fine now like it never had hurt in the first place?

I could still taste acid in my mouth, but I barely felt the cuts on my arms and hands from the glass.

Remus returned bearing a small trunk and knelt before me. I winced as he waved his wand and the pieces of glass pulled themselves from my skin.

Carefully he daubed an ointment on me that burned and then numbed the cuts. I watched in awe as some of them healed over entirely and shrunk.

I felt bone tired and didn't say a word as Remus continued in silence in wrapping the worst of the cuts. He glanced at me, his head still down, and I shuddered under his intense look. His blue eyes were especially piercing.

"Come on down stairs." He said after he had finished, tugging my hands to get me to stand. I did, but I found that I still felt a little weak. Remus caught me as I swayed.

"Hm." Remus muttered, and then pulled something out of his pocket. A length of wood that I had missed the presence of more than I had thought possible.

"Here." He pressed it in my hands and I took a sharp breath of air when touching it sent a of warmth tingling through my body and wiped out the rest of my weakness.

I still felt tired, but I was no longer swaying.

"God-" I choked, fingers clenched around the wood.

Remus looked like he had figured out a puzzle and was nodding to himself, "Feel better?"

"Yes." I said, staring at my wand in amazement.

"I thought you might." Remus said.

I looked up to meet those intensely blue eyes again and was slightly startled to see less distrust in them than before.

"Ah. I guess you decided that I'm telling the truth?" I asked, looking down at my wand again.

"You could say that," Remus replied. "You were right about one thing."

I sighed and pocketed the wand.

"Which thing?" I asked, though I already sort of knew.

Remus' hand clenched a bit into a fist at his side.

"They've found the rat."


	9. Learning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Well I saw Fantastic Beasts 2, who else did? Also, finally I introduce another favorite character's point of view. And some Black family politics, because I couldn't resist when so many of them are still alive at this point in history :p
> 
> Another slow/quick update! Though I've now finished the outline and finalized a few plot points. The story will be rounding out at 25 chapters.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I write this solely for the entertainment value it brings.

 

Severus Snape was not a nice man.

He knew it. His colleagues knew it. What few friends he had knew it

His students were convinced he wasn't even entirely human.

However underneath all the disgust, dislike, and outright fear and hate, not a one of them would deny that although he had a sharp tongue, his mind was sharper still.

So when the Daily Prophet proclaimed that mongrel's possible innocence, he turned directly to catch the eyes on ne Albus Dumbledore. Those twinkly blue eyes were infuriating at the best of times, but if there was one man who would probably have a good idea of the circumstances of finding Pettigrew alive, Severus knew it would be Albus.

The slight tip of his head in Severus' direction was all the confirmation he needed. The old coot knew something more of the situation. Not that he ever doubted.

The students of course were also shocked and eagerly gossiping away at the lower tables, huddled around newspapers. He had heard that there had been some kind of issue or commotion with the Weasley children the other day, and his eyes narrowed on the red-haired boys at the Gryffindor table. Both were looking pale and tight-lipped, the younger picking at his food morosely.

His attention was drawn back to his own table when Minerva drew in a gasp of air and clutched her chest as she read the headline. Flitwick was frowning and leaning over to read from her copy. Hagrid, the great oaf, was actually crying over his oatmeal, much to the Potion Master's disgust.

As if Black deserved tears. He'd done enough other things that deserved a stint in Azkaban, even if he wasn't actually a murderer and a traitor.

He pushed away his own coffee and toast. This was going to mean some changes. Although he couldn't predict what they would be yet.

Potter would be arriving at Hogwarts very soon. Two years would pass by in a blink. Especially since this year was almost over. He had no doubt the boy would be just as insufferable as his father, but should Black be allowed to take over custody. Well, Severus shuddered to think how much worse the brat would be.

* * *

Sirius' trial did not take very much more time after that. Well, at least the clearing of all past charges. It would take a while longer for the countersuit to go through, but Darling was confident with that going well too.

The public had been shut out and the full Wizengamot had been called in to debate. With Pettigrew alive though, and confronted with his Dark Mark plus Dumbledore's testimony...well not even that incompetent body of bureaucracy could deny his innocence. They hardly even needed Sirius' testimony.

The proclamation of his innocence left him rocked to his core. The manacles and chains immediately unwound from his body. He was a free man. Those first few steps out of that chair were painful and he barely heard them dismissing him as they decided the rat's fate. Wisely, they had kept the two in different rooms at all times so as not to lay eyes on the other.

His first thought was to go finish the job. With his bare hands if he had to. The anger was still a burning stone in his stomach. He half turned to do just that, but although he was free, the ministry wasn't entirely stupid, for once. Two aurors immediately flanked him. They escorted him from the trial room to a smaller office and sat him down before a witch who started handing him parchments to sign.

Darling appeared at his side, a wicked gleam in his eyes and an air of smugness about him. He guided Sirius through signing the papers and then the witch left and his lawyer went over all of his rights, restored bank vaults, and properties. Then he paused and Sirius finally came out of the shock he had been in.

"Ah hem. Well, there is another thing. The matter of my services and fees..."

Sirius nearly rolled his eyes. At this point he didn't care. His Uncle Alphard had left him a significant amount of gold. It had probably only grown with him not touching it. He wasn't worried at all about affording the lawyer's services.

"Send me a bill." Sirius said, feeling strange that these were some of the first words he spoke as a free man.

Darling flushed, "Well actually, that's the thing. I was appointed by a representative of your family, all the legal fees are covered by the Black family. Though I will of course be taking a percentage of whatever reparations you will receive from the Ministry... "

A wave of revulsion swept through Sirius. "My mother? That's impossible," he shook his head in denial.

"No actually, your mother passed away-"

Sirius snorted, "Good riddance."

Darling shot him a reproving look, "Your grandfather, Arcturus arranged everything."

"But I was disowned!" Sirius spat out, not wanting anything to do with whatever relatives he had left.

Darling grimaced, "You've been reinstated as heir. Seeing as Arcturus is the last of the main line, he made the decision, though he was not well enough to come to the trial. He requests that you meet with him as soon as possible."

Sirius simply stared. The old man was still alive? He would have inherited all personal properties and gold his immediate family members had held anyway, little though he wanted it, once cleared of all charges, even having been disowned from the family.

But being reinstated as the heir was something else entirely. It came with a whole load of responsibilities as well as privileges. The heir of the Black family was entitled to a lot more. Why bother? Obviously his grandfather wanted something and despite personal feelings, he felt like Sirius was necessary to the survival of the Black family name.

Not that they deserved having the family name preserved. Sirius would be quite happy to be the last Black. If he ever had kids, he'd give them their mother's name. Fuck his family.

"If the old man wants something, he can come to me." Sirius growled, standing to his feet, "Are we done here?"

"Ah yes, well, one more thing." Darling hurriedly withdrew a long thin box from his case. Sirius stared at it hungrily as he slid it across the desk. "A friend was holding on to it for you."

He didn't waste any time opening the box and wrapping his fingers around the wood. He was amazed it hadn't been snapped. The familiar warmth was almost an ache as places he had forgotten were empty were filled to the brim and spilled over. A stream of red sparks fountained from the wand as he gave it a flourish in the air.

The moment passed quickly though and he quickly turned the wand on himself, relishing in the widening of Darling's eyes as he transfigured his clothes into blue jeans and a muggle tee shirt. He twirled the wand, wondering who had held on to it for him.

Then he imagined casting the nastiest hexes he knew at the rat and he wondered if he could find the man before they hauled him off to Azkaban. He knew where the holding cells were after all.

Likely the vengeful gleam in his eyes must have been obvious because his lawyer shot him a warning look.

"As your lawyer, I really must insist you don't do anything rash. Really you ought to go to St. Mungos. Transportation has already been arranged and all costs are being covered by the ministry currently…" Darling trailed off as Sirius ran a hand through his hair and snorted.

"We're done here. You can contact me by owl about the rest later. Now, if you'll excuse me, for the first time in years I'm allowed to do whatever the fuck I want. So I'm going to do that."

Darling sputtered incoherently but Sirius was already sweeping out the door. The two aurors standing outside were accompanied by a healer in green robes, but Sirius was done being moved about on other's whims. He quickly slipped by them, ignoring their expressions of startlement, winked at them saucily, then spun on his heal and apparated with a  _POP_!

* * *

Sirius reappeared in front of the marble facade of Gringotts, where he quickly swept in, ignoring people who started to mutter and point. He must have looked entirely disreputable. Though he had bathed, his hair was still long and shaggy and his beard was rivaling Dumbledore's.

The goblins didn't give a fuck who he was, though one witch outright gave a little scream upon seeing him in the teller line. He ignored that and simply presented his paperwork and the goblin's presented him with a key to his vault. He didn't bother going to see it, he just withdrew an obscene amount of gold, changed some into muggle cash, and then swept out again.

There was a small crowd forming outside the bank, and already he could see the reporters clutching their cameras. He apparated again the moment he stepped beyond Gringott's wards.

* * *

I allowed Remus to lead me downstairs and hand me a mug of hot chocolate. He slid the newspaper to me and I read the article with interest.

"So now what? Am I still a prisoner?" I asked, laying it down again. Remus frowned, "I would guess we will be contacted soon by Albus, though he might be busy because of the trial. Certainly you're welcome to stay here, that is, if you don't mind…" he trailed off.

"I do need a place to stay that is warded against muggles." I returned calmly, "And I can't afford to pay the fine for continuing to live at my place. I have twenty something days to move."

"And I did promise to help you with everything." Remus said with a tone of finality. "It's not much, but it's mine, and you're welcome to it, for now." Remus gestured at his home self-deprecatingly.

"I'm not dumb." I said, narrowing my eyes, "You can't flip a switch on trusting someone that quickly, and we haven't proved everything I said."

Remus shrugged, "This was...well it was certainly not the least of all the things you've claimed, and now having witnessed what just happened to you, I'm inclined to go on the assumption that you are not crazy or lying."

He folded his hands together on the table, "It would be in our best interests to continue keeping you away from other potentially interested parties too." His eyes met mine, and although I appreciate his honesty, the words still stung.

"Thanks." I said sarcastically. Then sighed, "Sorry. It's just hard."

Remus coughed, "I'm sure. Apology accepted."

"What was that upstairs anyway?" I asked after a moment of sipping the hot beverage. It was delicious.

He sat across from me at the kitchen table, and he looked tired. "You said you were having accidental magic incidents. I assume, that's probably what happened."

I felt a trickle of fear run through me, "But that's not anywhere close to what happened before. I never felt so...like my head was splitting open. Like a migraine, but the worst one I've ever had."

Remus shrugged, "Not much is known about the topic, but witches and wizards who have their magic suppressed in some way, well, they can have similar outbursts. It makes them ill, you see, and eventually kills them, supposedly."

"But I'm not suppressing anything! I never even had magic before." I protested, clenching my hands around the mug.

"I don't have the answers," Remus grimaced, "All I can do is make some guesses, and who really knows? Has there ever been a muggle who gained magic?"

He looked a little nauseous at the thought, "You'd best never ever mention it to anyone else. Especially not a pureblood."

My heart pounded in my chest, but I couldn't help asking.

"Why?"

Remus sighed, and put down his mug. "I would assume they would take it badly. Pureblood's, the worst of them you understand, already have a theory that muggleborn witches and wizards are simply muggles who somehow stole magic-"

"And I would be proof of that," I interrupted, staring into the brown liquid in my cup.

Remus nodded, "For the most fanatical, yes."

I sighed, "But I'm not trying to suppress anything."

Remus held up his hands helplessly, "Since your wand seemed to help the symptoms, I would guess that your body is simply trying to make sense of something it never had before. Like you're going through magical puberty. But since you're not actively using magic...if you somehow got a magical core and it didn't develop slowly….then maybe there's a buildup or it is having issues finding outlets…" He trailed off and abruptly got up and left for the dining room.

I stared as he heaved a huge book in a few moments later and plunked it down on the table.

"Normally I'd say you need to see a healer…" Remus muttered, flipping pages and looking for something.

"But since we can't tell the truth…" I continued with my own grimace. This was so complicated.

Remus nodded, "This is a book on magical development. Written by a muggleborn, so of course it's not a very popular book, but it tries to compare what is known of muggle biology and childhood development with wizard development."

"Wow...okay." I said, leaning over to look. Why on earth would Remus Lupin be interested in this book? He had opened the book to the table of contents and was running down the list with a finger. He faltered briefly as his finger touched on a chapter entitled  _Magical Children and Cursed Parents_ , before blushing and continuing his search.

Oh.

"Here's the chapter on magical core development…" Remus flipped to the page, and we both skimmed the introduction.

I sighed almost immediately. The terminology was too technical for me, and I got lost almost immediately, though it was clear Remus was fascinated. I leaned back and reached for my hot chocolate again.

Remus was totally engrossed in the book, and I watched him as he read intently. He was a good looking man, I thought idly.

"Yes, magic needs to be exercised starting a little before children start to enter the last stage of physical maturation." Remus said, showing me the relevant passage. It had a complicated diagram of a human and all sorts of colored lines and patches that moved like a video on the page. It was disconcerting.

"I'll take your word for it." I said.

"So you're basically like a child entering that phase of magical maturation. Here, see these symptoms align with your own if magic does get suppressed at this stage…" Remus flipped the pages and showed me a list of maladies and illnesses.

"What's the cure then?" I asked, skimming the list. Magical accidents, physical dream manifestation, followed by worsening symptoms and manifestations of physical ailments. I paled as the list got more dire.

"Simply using magic. Getting around the suppression. Though in this case, I think it's a lack of using your magic at all since you've arrived, and supposedly gained a magical core." He paused then continued, "I think this because when I gave you your wand you felt instantly better. Wands always draw upon our magic. They're tied to us like a familiar, but deeper, you understand."

I met his eyes, "So giving it to you was…"

He smiled a bit, "Very intimate in some ways. Close friends and family often can use each other's wands. One does not easily give up that connection."

Inexplicably, I blushed. I leaned back and picked up my wand, trying to avoid bringing attention to my warm cheeks, "But then why wouldn't any adult or someone who stopped using their magic, or who lost their wand, have problems like me?" I asked.

"Well they do. Loss of magic and physical illness and ailments are associated with adults who voluntarily or otherwise stop using their magic. But not all magic requires a wand. Most people would be alright without one for awhile. I suspect wizards and witches with magical creature blood somehow avoid this trap too, due to other genetic qualities…" Remus trailed off, "But I digress. You're an adult, and you haven't used magic consciously or otherwise since you got here, because you never learned how."

He closed the book and leaned back too. "Magic isn't logical though. In a lot of ways, magic is intent, or is influenced by intent. You've only just been made aware of it recently. I suspect that's why your symptoms increased dramatically, because your magic sensed that you sensed it. In a manner of speaking."

"I'm used to science." I groaned, "Not magic." Remus chuckled, "You just need an imagination, and to accept that anything is possible. Or well, most things are. Even magic has limits."

"So complicated." I muttered.

Remus grinned, "Don't worry. We'll start with the basics."

* * *

He was almost giddy with freedom. So many things. There were so many things he could do now. So many things he had hardly dreamed of in the past years. He couldn't quite decide which to do first.

He had apparated into Muggle London. Not far from the flat he had first taken on his own after Hogwarts. The world had changed a lot. The park he was sitting in had been cleaned up since he'd last been there. He hardly cared. He sank down on a park bench, finally alone again.

He'd been alone too much, but he would almost take being in a cell again over being surrounded by lawyers and politicians.

The threat of the dementors was gone, for now, and he felt almost high in the absence of their presence. Now there was a thought. He could get high again.

He laughed, the sound so unfamiliar it grated and left his throat in an almost shout. A woman with a pram walking by shot him a disapproving glare. He grinned at her.

His eye landed on a row of shops across the street. There was a secondhand clothes store and a barber. Perfect.

* * *

Remus was a hard task master.

I should have known that he would have paid attention to what I'd been reading the night before.

Still, he decided to let me study theory on my own, and focus on pushing me on the physical aspect of magic.

Though of course, it wasn't that simple. As Remus explained, magic wasn't exactly physical. In order to control it, one had to master the art of directing it with their mind as well as producing it in their body.

In other words, you had to visualize, and force your intent to manifest physically, using magic as a tool to do so.

He knew when to push me though, and when to back off. On the first day, I had accomplished the most basic of spells. Lumos. But others eluded me.

We focused mainly on charms. Transfiguration was very theory heavy and potions was not Remus' strong suit. It hardly mattered, because what I needed most was to just practice. In terms of practicality, I didn't need to know how to brew a basic potion. I did need to know how to defend myself.

Magic felt... Slippery. Like something I only just had the most tentative of grasps on, and it frequently slipped through my fingers.

Remus was encouraging, and of course it was only my first lesson, but it sucked. I wasn't going to be able to cast anything complicated anytime soon.

I quickly grew frustrated and he called a break. I spent the afternoon studying my textbook, until Remus handed me some other books on magical theory.

It was very tiring, and all the while I was expecting that we would hear from Dumbledore, surely. But no owl came.

The next morning I got up and started all over again. The Prophet had announced a special evening edition was going to be put out after Sirius' trial. Which was in the morning.

But in the meantime, Remus could barely concentrate, so I claimed weariness and went back to reading. He paced his home like a caged animal, frequently glancing out the window.

We both jumped when a loud crashing noise and swearing reached our ears.

* * *

He stared into the mirror a little too long after the barber had finished. He had aged so much in Azkaban. He wasn't yet thirty, but he looked to be far older. Too many lines furrowed in his skin. He was too thin. His cheeks hollowed and his body gaunt. With the beard missing, the paleness and thinness of his face was more apparent.

He hadn't exactly been vain, but the man looking back at him from the mirror didn't look like how he thought he should. He turned away, clearing his throat, and paid.

His slight high from being free had worn off, in between buying clothes, getting his hair cut, and face shaved. He could have done these things with magic on his own, but he had craved something else. He craved feeling normal. The muggle world had been an escape from his family, and was familiar to him.

But he just felt hollow now. What was normal? Several days ago being a dog most of the day had been normal. Eating rats had been normal.

He shuddered, feeling suddenly nauseous. He really should go to Mungos. He still hurt and he was physically weak. But he could barely stand the thought of going back to be surrounded by people who would look at him with curiosity, with fear.

It didn't seem real. The whole world was his, but he suddenly felt too exposed. Like an open wound.

What to do, where to go?

Harry. His mind whispered. His godson. His godson.

He had to, well he had to do something about that. His mind felt muddled and he was tired.

Who would help him no matter the circumstances? Lily...James...Remus. Remus. He could go to Remus, couldn't he?

He turned and apparated with another  _Pop_!

Sirius reappeared on a country lane, familiar even though it had been years since he had been there. He staggered a bit, the energy needed to get there had been a bit much. He'd always been impulsive, and this probably hadn't been one of his better ideas.

His mind did feel a little clearer though, so he started stumbling towards the house. He really hoped Remus was home because he was too tired to go elsewhere now.

He made it to the gate, but his feet tangled up and he fell against it with a loud crash. He swore as he pulled himself back to his feet and unlatched the blasted thing.

"Sirius?!" The familiar voice was filled with surprise and exasperation.

He looked up, and couldn't help the grin that spread across his face. Remus look poleaxed, though he had to have heard of the trial. His friend hadn't changed much, besides a few more lines and wrinkles. He looked just as tired and careworn as ever.

"Care to help an old friend, Remus?" Sirius aimed for being cocky, but his voice cracked a bit as emotion overwhelmed him.

"You-" Remus sputtered and lurched forward, embracing Sirirus tightly. So tightly it hurt, but he didn't care. " _Sirius_." Remus said his name like a prayer. Sirius leaned into the embrace with a sigh, tears already falling from his eyes. It felt like coming home.

Then Remus shoved him back with a frown, his hands spasming on Sirius' shoulders. His face was equal parts furious, worried, and exasperated.

"You  _idiot_! Did you come straight here? You should have gone to Mungos you wanker."

Sirius chuckled hoarsely, "I was tired of being led about and cooped up. I'll call a private healer. I'm not about to keel over this instant." Remus looked frustrated at the reply.

"You look it." he said, scanning his friend from top to bottom. Then he hugged him again, more gently.

"I don't even know what to say." Remus said, his voice choked with tears.

"Missed you, Moony." Sirius sighed into his friend's shoulder. 


	10. Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I had to go all gooey and sentimental in this chapter. It took more space than I realized! Hope you enjoy it anyway :) Happy holidays everyone!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I write this solely for the entertainment value it brings.

 

* * *

I heard two voices approaching the mud room. I laid my book down, already sort of knowing exactly who it was.

The man who entered with Remus was a strange mix of looks. He was tall, and his hair was neatly trimmed but still long. It was black as a raven's wing and slightly wavy. He was clean shaven, had striking gray eyes, and he had features anyone would claim were aristocratically handsome.

He was also gaunt and pale. His skin almost waxy looking even in the sunlight. Though clean and wearing jeans and a tee shirt, he looked like he wouldn't quite fit in a public place. Maybe it was something about his eyes.

Something haunted and hunted. Something not quite sane.

He leaned heavily on Remus who helped him to the couch, and he looked as though every movement pained him.

Those eyes drilled right into me. He had bruises beneath them, but even so, I was caught in their magnetic power. I have never seen a pair of eyes that exact shade before. Though obviously in pretty bad shape, he was probably one of the most beautiful people I had ever laid eyes on in person.

I couldn't take  _my_  eyes off of him.

* * *

"You're living with a girl, Moony?" Sirius grinned and slumped down on the couch, glancing at the witch in the armchair. She didn't look afraid of him, but she did look rather surprised. She was pretty. Very pretty. He approved.

She had caught his gaze and he couldn't help winking at her. A slight blush rose on her cheeks and she looked away. How long had it been since he'd winked at a pretty bird? Too long.

Remus blushed. "It's not like that." He said in a mild voice. He sighed and rubbed his face. Sirius' attention was brought back to his friend.

"I'm helping her with something, and she needed a place to stay. It's...complicated." Remus said. The witch snorted and got to her feet.

"I'll just go then, shall I? I'm sure you've got a lot of catching up to do." She rose abruptly and swept from the room. Sirius noted Remus' wince.

"She's prickly." Sirius commented while leaning back in to the pillows.

"She's...well she's really something." Remus said. He seemed hesitant, but then he sighed and waved his wand towards the kitchen. A pot of tea started making itself and Remus sat down.

"There's so much- She's the reason-" Remus stopped and started, then he sighed again.

"I don't know where to begin. But basically, she's the reason you're here."

Sirius sat up straight at that, paying a little more attention.

"What?"

"She knew about Peter. Knew where he was and how to find him." Remus said, waving a pot of tea and a cup towards his friend.

Sirius took the cup but continued staring at the doorway she had walked through.

"She's a seer?" He asked, taking a sip. Real tea. Made just how he used to like it. He could almost cry. He drained the cup in one go and set it down again.

"Not exactly." Remus frowned, "It's complicated." He reiterated.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "I'm getting that." He closed his eyes tiredly and lay flat on the couch. It was so soft. So warm.

He was too tired to pursue that line of questioning now. Though he owed her a considerable debt, he would figure out the details on it later. It was enough for now that he was free.

"You really should have gone to Mungos." Remus said, a tinge of worry in his tone.

This time it was Sirius turn to sigh, "Just let me have this. Right now."

Remus stayed silent as a few tears escaped Sirius eyes and ran down his face.

"How are you?" Remus asked after the tears stopped again.

Sirius' laughter was just as bark like as ever as it escaped his throat.

"Buggered if I know. Just...just a few days ago...I was sure I was going to have to escape and kill him myself."

Sirius said, firmly keeping his eyes on the ceiling as he reopened them.

"I could have done it too. Azkaban is too good for that...that…and I should know! How we ever suspected you, Moony..." His voice cracked and he fell silent again.

Remus was silent, and he was avoiding actually looking at him.

"It's alright Sirius. Those were...different times. If you can forgive me-" and now it was Remus' voice that was cracking. Sirius turned to look at him incredulously,

"For what?"

"For believing the worst of you. For not trying harder to get you out of that-that hell hole." Remus said vehemently, his hands curled into fists in his lap.

Sirius grinned in a sad sort of way, "Always so masochistic, Moony," he chided, "There's nothing to forgive."

Both fell silent as they absorbed the other's absolution.

"Look at us, eh?" Sirius choked a on a chuckle, "We're getting to be sentimental old women."

"You came here blubbering on me first, you tosser." Remus rubbed faintly at his eyes as he snorted.

"Sod off Remus." Sirius grinned, then the grin fell.

"What about…" he started, unsure.

"About what?" Remus asked.

"Harry. What about little  _Harry_?"

Remus stiffened and looked away, much to Sirius' alarm. He began to rise but Remus quickly stopped him, "No, no, there's nothing...wrong exactly. I just haven't been able to see him. They wouldn't let me." Remus said bitterly, making an abortive gesture with his hands. "He's been placed with his Aunt."

"Petunia? That hag?" Sirius said, disgust rising in him, "You didn't even try?" He asked, this time with anger.

Remus shot him a cold look, "Of course I did. I wouldn't just...but Dumbledore hid him well. Just in case anyone went after him. I have no idea where he is. And being a werewolf...well."

" _Dumbledore_." Sirius frowned.

"He's part of the reason you're free, you know." Remus said helplessly.

Sirius sighed and leaned back again. "I can't. I can't take care of him yet, Moony. But I can't leave him there either." His voice cracked again and Remus finally crossed the space between them to clasp his hand.

"I'll help you. We'll get him. But you've got to take care of yourself first."

Sirius found Remus' eyes and held them with his own. "I'm a mess, Moony." He admitted in heartbroken small sort of voice.

"We always got into messes together, eh Padfoot? And I was usually the one cleaning them up." Remus tried to be cheerful, squeezing Sirius' hand.

"Right." Sirius said faintly.

"I'm calling a healer for you." Remus said with finality. "And a mind healer as well." Sirius opened his mouth to protest, but Remus squeezed his hand again.

"I know you're an accomplished Occlumens and you seem remarkably together. But Padfoot, you just spent  _eight_  years in Azkaban with the dementors."

Sirius shuddered. "You're right." He admitted. "I need...I don't know  _what_  I need."

Remus ran a hand over his hair in frustration. " _Let_  me help you."

"Alright." Sirius agreed, then he released Remus' hand and dug in his pocket, removing some shrunken items. Remus took them and unshrunk them, finding a packet of documents and some clothes.

Remus scanned the papers while Sirius closed his eyes again.

"Sirius?" Remus asked after a few minutes.

"Yeah?" He opened his eyes and looked at his friend.

"You have a house elf. You have multiple house elves." Remus said incredulously.

"Do I?" Sirius asked, tiredly, "So what?"

Remus resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "So you can call one and they can run errands, take messages, get a healer, cook for you, and so on."

"Oh." Sirius said, "Let me see their names."

He sat up and squinted at the list. Kreacher, that cretin was still alive? Merlin help him.

He saw two other names listed below. He recognized one name. Another elf who had served his father, and the last he didn't know.

He decided to call the one he didn't know. Both Kreacher and Melchett had hated him, and the feeling was entirely mutual…

"Kinny." He said after a brief pause.

A crack split the air and before him was a young female elf with bulging brown eyes. She wore an old pillowcase which she was twisting nervously in her hands.

"Master calls?" She asked.

Sirius squinted at her. "I don't remember you."

"Master Sirius sir. Kinny is a new addition and proud to serve the Black family and Master Sirius." She bowed and gulped, then looked sideways at Remus.

"My grandfather acquired you then." Sirius frowned, which made Canna squeak.

"Y-Yes! I-I am being Melchett's granddaughter, sir." She bowed again.

"What can Kinny do for you Master Sirius?" She asked, almost desperately.

Sirius sighed and leaned back again, "Do whatever Remus asks you too, as if I were the one giving the orders. And calm down. I'm not going to punish you. Just don't tell my grandfather where I am or anything about how I am doing, understand?"

Kinny's eyes went wide and she nodded hurriedly then turned to look at Remus.

"Sirius needs a healer. Two actually. A regular one and a mind healer. Go to St. Mungo's and bring them here." Remus ordered.

"Yes sir!" Kinny agreed, then vanished with another crack.

"House elves make my head hurt." Sirius groaned.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Not everyone can be as lucky as you to have them."

"Lucky." Sirius scoffed, throwing an arm over his eyes.

* * *

Kinny reappeared some time later, a woman in healer green robes in tow. The poor elf was distraught because she had only brought one healer. Remus shook the healer's hand while also trying to calm down the elf.

"I'm Healer Ames." The woman said briskly, "I specialize in mind healing but I'm accomplished in regular healing as well. Where is the patient?"

"It's alright Kinny, you still followed my orders." Remus reassured as the elf tugged on her ears. "Please don't punish yourself." Kinny immediately dropped her hands from her ears. "Why don't you cook something for dinner?" The elf nodded tearfully.

"And ah, yes, he's right through here." Remus redirected his attention and gestured for the healer to follow him.

She paused briefly at the door upon seeing Sirius laid out on the couch.

"Sirius Black?" She asked, and Remus nodded. "You're familiar…?" He asked awkwardly.

Healer Ames snorted, "Am I familiar with the latest ministry scandal? Well of course. Mungos was expecting him hours ago."

"I've never been one to do what others want." Sirius chipped in, raising his arm from his face.

"I can see that." Ames said drily, pulling her wand out and setting a bag on the couch.

"I'm Healer Ames. Everything I do for you is confidential of course, and anything I discover through occlumency is protected by magical oath. Which I will only attempt for the purposes of healing and with your consent."

She paused in what was obviously a recited and rehearsed speech and eyed Sirius slumped on the couch, "For now I think I had better focus on purely physical healing. I've never treated anyone who was held under the conditions you have been. I'm sure you're in poor health."

Sirius sighed in relief and nodded.

Ames flicked her eyes to Remus, "You may stay if you wish, but keep clear."

Remus nodded and stepped back a bit further.

Satisfied, the healer muttered and began waving her wand. A complex set of lights flickered into sight, most glowing orange, some red, some gray. One or two other more cheerful colors were also in evidence.

"Have you taken anything for your discomfort recently?" She asked, "Can you list any symptoms you're having for me?"

"Tired. Hurt all over. My head feels a little fuzzy. I'm cold." Sirius started reeling off. "Basically feel like shit. Haven't had time to take anything." Here he paused and grinned, "I could use a Firewhiskey though."

Ames reached for her bag and rifled through it, removing a case filled with various flaks. "Better wait on the whiskey for now." She popped the cork off one bottle and then summoned a glass from the bag with measurements written on the side.

"Well, you have malnutrition, and you've got some nerve damage. Your seratonin and dopamine levels are practically nonexistent. Your immune system is compromised and your lungs are weak. I can fix most of that, with a regimen of potions."

She poured out a measure of the potion, it sparkled slightly and was silver in color.

She continued, "The nerve damage and chemical imbalance in your brain are a little trickier, since their cause is magical in origin."

"Chemical imbalance in my brain?" Sirius repeated incredulously.

"Commonly known as depression," Ames went on matter-of-factly, "Physiological differences do exist when it comes to mental trauma. I can do quite a bit for physical trauma. Magical trauma, especially of the dark or cursed variety, is more difficult. It likes to linger."

"So what are you saying?" Sirius asked with a scowl.

Ames raised an eyebrow and a faintly humorous smile touched her lips, "If you weren't mad before, you certainly are now that the dementors have inflicted long term damage on your mind. However," here she paused and eyed him knowingly, "You do seem to have some in-built resilience. You're not nearly as damaged as I expected you to be. Your mind should be all but broken, as it were, but you're coherent enough. You must have had some way to magically protect your mind. Possibly more than one way."

Sirius glanced at Remus, "I am an Occlumens."

Ames sighed, "That would have helped, but it wouldn't have been enough. Might I remind you that I cannot divulge anything you tell me, and it is best to be honest with your healer. I can't treat you unless I have all the necessary information."

Sirius rubbed his face tiredly, "I'm an animagus too. I spent most of my time there in my other form." He admitted. Remus winced.

"Emotions didn't hurt me so much. They couldn't reach me, an animal mind is different you know…" Sirius explained.

Ames handed him the glass, "Fascinating. Well I'm sure it did other damage, but between that and the alternative...well that very well may have saved your life Mr. Black." She cleared her throat.

"Now that is a pain potion. I will give you some doses of it and instructions on usage, but it is a controlled substance and must be handled by a licensed healer."

Sirius gratefully swallowed it down and shuddered at the abrupt leaving of any lingering pain in his body. It felt amazing.

"Do you still feel any pain? Other discomfort?" Ames asked, already pulling out more bottles.

"Still cold." He muttered.

"Your core temperature is a little low. I can heal some of the damage, but it's linked to exposure to the dementors for so long I'm afraid. You may always feel a little cold." Ames said, not without a little sympathy.

"I can give you nutrition potions, something to start healing your nerves, something to boost your immunity, and I can give you some dreamless sleep."

She sent a sharp look at him, "Mind you, some of these can be very addicting. If you feel the need to take an extra dose, weigh very carefully whether you can function with it or not. When in doubt, you will call me. I can help regulate the dosage."

Sirius nodded reluctantly. He was very tempted to take a crazy large dose of dreamless sleep. Oblivion was very tempting. But he understood the dangers.

"I'll be staying the night to monitor you since the nerve potion can have complications. In the morning, if you consent, I can do a brief review of the magical damage in your mind via Legilimency."

"That's probably for the best." Remus broke in, "You're welcome to stay here, though I don't have a spare room." He added, a little embarrassed.

"Quite alright. I will have enough to do writing up a treatment plan. I can make myself comfortable at your table. I do have to go and get a few things, I didn't know I'd be treating someone with such a complicated set of health concerns." Ames.

"So diplomatic." Sirius said. "Oof. Those potions made me all woozy."

"A common side effect. Eat something if you can Mr. Black. I'll be back a little later." Ames finished packing up her bag and Remus left to escort her outside past his wards.

Sirius was in the least amount of pain he could remember being in for a long time. It had indeed made his head a little woozy. Almost as good as Firewhiskey. He probably was a total lightweight now.

Footsteps above his head made him glance up at the ceiling. In the kitchen he could hear the nervous elf moving things and a delicious smell started wafting his way.

He was alone again. He didn't like being alone. Everything seemed to press in on him more. He'd been stuck mostly inside his own head for too long.

* * *

I was sorely tempted to eavesdrop on Remus and Sirius. However I held myself back. That was definitely not a way to gain trust, and anyway, surely they both deserved some privacy together.

Instead I withdrew my wand and continued to try the levitating charm. It wasn't working at all. I was beginning to feel like a moron.

"Fuck this." I muttered after a fruitless hour. I could smell food downstairs but I wasn't hungry and nobody appeared to invite me to eat anyway.

I probably could have gone down on my own but I was surprisingly tired. Gandalf hooted at me from his perch on the dresser.

"Oh shush. I'm just tired." If an owl could feel skepticism, mine certainly pulled the look off well. He glided to my bedspread and shuffled sideways. Then he nipped my fingers. Hard.

"Ow! What did I ever do to you,  _mellon nin_?" I griped, pulling my smarting fingers out of his reach. He hooted in satisfaction, blinking his wide eyes at me in something approaching innocence.

"I hope Morgoth burns your feathers." I said sourly. Still I raised a hand to pet his soft head. He trilled under the attention, then shuffled to the end of the bed and launched himself off the edge and out the window.

"Crazy bird."

I had probably deserved it. But still. My bird had an attitude.

I wasn't feeling so morose. Though I was still awfully tired. I had a feeling all the magic practice was wearing me out.

I laid down on the bed. I only meant to rest my eyes but soon I was drifting to sleep.

My dreams were filled with the sound of beating wings and the echoes of strange animals crying in the night.


End file.
